Journey to the West: I Turn Around and Put the Golden Headband on Tang Sanzang

I transmigrated into Sun Wukong, fresh out from under Five Elements Mountain. Before I could even stretch my limbs, I saw a smooth-skinned monk holding a flower-patterned hat and coaxing me with a loving smile.

“Wukong, look how pretty this hat is. Why don’t you try it on?”

In my previous life, I was Sun Wu, a top psychologist. I saw right through Tang Sanzang’s trick and the Buddhist radiance hidden beneath that hat. Go to the Western Heaven on a pilgrimage? Work like a beast for 108,000 miles, only to end up with the empty title of Victorious Fighting Buddha? Not a chance!

[Ding! Defy Fate System activated! Choice One: Put on the golden band obediently, protect Tang Sanzang on the Journey to the West, and endure the Eighty-One Tribulations. Reward: One Merit Golden Lotus. Choice Two: Turn the tables and put the golden band on Tang Sanzang, so he knows who’s boss! Reward: Chaos Demon Ape bloodline!]

“Do I even need to choose? Obviously, two!”

Sun Wu chuckled, snatched the golden band, and clapped it onto Tang Sanzang’s bald head with lightning speed.

“Master, your profound Buddhist wisdom makes you the perfect match for this treasure! From now on, I’m in charge of this pilgrimage! If you disagree, I’ll chant the ‘Tightening-Band Mantra’!”

Guanyin was dumbfounded. The gods and Buddhas throughout the heavens were stunned.

The White Bone Spirit wants to put on an act? I’ll kill her with one strike, then make Tang Sanzang eat meat.

Demons with powerful backers want to go through the motions? Sorry, I’ll beat you and your backers together!

Tathagata Buddha wants to control everything? Then I’ll storm Mount Lingshan and smash your Thunderclap Monastery!

On this journey, I’ll kill any god who stands in my way and slay any Buddha who opposes me! I’ll show all the gods and Buddhas in the heavens that I alone decide my fate!