Before Doomsday, Grandma Appeared in My Dream and Told Me to Stockpile More

A Princess of the Underworld, a fierce Northeastern woman, and a village chief in an empty village: this apocalypse survival story is pure, unfiltered chaos! Liu Laokuai, a young man from Liuzhou, Guangxi, dreamed of his late grandmother two nights in a row. The first time, he thought she needed money, so he burned three jin of paper money in the middle of the night to appease her. The second time, his grandmother anxiously stamped her feet in the dream. “Dear grandson, stop burning money! In a month, the whole world will hit 80 degrees, and the apocalypse is coming!” Even more absurdly, she said: “I remarried the King of Hell in the underworld! I arranged for your grandpa to sweep the streets by the Bridge of Helplessness. He's got a stable job for life!” “The King of Hell let it slip while drunk. Nobody else in the underworld knows this, so hurry up!” Liu Laokuai wasn't sure whether to believe her, but remembering how kind she'd been to him when she was alive, he decided to trust her. He sold his house overnight, maxed out his credit cards, borrowed from every online lender he could find, and flew straight to Mohe, Heilongjiang. But as soon as he reached an “empty village” tucked away in the mountains, he ran into a Northeastern woman standing 178 centimeters tall, wearing size-63 shoes with sweaty feet, and capable of taking down a wild boar single-handedly. The next day, his grandmother appeared in another dream, sounding thrilled: “Oh, what a great girl! Wide hips, perfect for having kids! Big feet, so she'll be steady on her feet!” Liu Laokuai broke down. “Grandma, I'm only 25, and Yu-jie is 38!” His grandmother scolded him for not seeing sense: “It's the apocalypse! You should be grateful to find a woman at all! I'm still waiting to hold my great-grandchild! What do you mean you don't want her?” The only village chief who hadn't moved away was Yu-jie's father. He spent his days strolling around with his hands behind his back. “It's not that I'm greedy for this official post. It's mostly that... I can't bear to leave these mountains and rivers.” (What he was really thinking: Damn it, if it weren't for this secure government job, I'd have bought a house in Sanya ages ago and settled down to sunbathe!)