Journey to the West: Fahai Goes on the Pilgrimage

This humble monk is Fahai. I don't understand love, but I do understand physical exorcism! I woke up to find that I had transmigrated into Journey to the West and become Tang Sanzang, a Pilgrim so weak he couldn't even hold down a chicken. Just as Fahai thought he had lost all his heaven-shaking cultivation, the [Ultimate Journey to the West System] awakened! “Ding! The Host's soul is a perfect match for Tang Seng's true form, the Six-Winged Golden Cicada. Beginning energy fusion!” “Fusion successful! Congratulations, Host. You have ascended to the heavens in a single bound and attained the Quasi-Saint Dao!” A Quasi-Saint from the start?! Feeling the world-destroying magical power coursing through him, Fahai, now Tang Sanzang, wore a cold smile. A pilgrimage? Sure. Eighty-One Tribulations? Perfect. This humble monk wants to see whether demons have harder heads, or this monk's staff! At the foot of Five Elements Mountain, Sun Wukong was about to put his new master in his place when one slap sent him straight into the ground. “You unruly monkey, show disrespect to your master again, and this humble monk will purify you with the Mighty Heavenly Dragon!” In Gao Village, Zhu Bajie was just about to slack off when a golden Buddha's palm blotted out the sky and pinned him down. “Lazy fool, slack off again and I'll roast you for New Year's Eve dinner!” From then on, the whole tone of Journey to the West went completely off the rails. Other Tang Sanzangs deliver all living beings. Mine delivers them physically. Other Tang Sanzangs get captured by demons. Mine chases demons down and beats them up. The gods and Buddhas of Heaven: “??? We told you to go fetch the scriptures, not steamroll everything!” Tathagata Buddha: “Amitabha Buddha, Golden Cicada, are you willing to become a Buddha?” Tang Sanzang (Fahai): “A Buddha? This humble monk can be one all by himself!”