A Rascal's Guide to Cultivation

Lin Hao is a food delivery rider nobody likes. He’s so weak that he’s out of breath after two deliveries, and so foul-mouthed that customers chase him down to curse him out. He’s a classic little hoodlum who runs when he can’t win and shouts threats as he goes. Until one day, during a torrential downpour, a customer shoved him for delivering late. He got soaked, came down with a fever, and lay in his rented room. Then, in a dream, a woman in a white dress suddenly appeared. She wasted no words, reaching out to touch the sword-shaped birthmark on his neck. “Draw qi into the mark, and it will protect you.” When Lin Hao awoke, the birthmark was glowing red. A warm current spread from his dantian throughout his body, and his fever had actually broken! Stranger still, when he followed the breathing method from his dream, he could climb to the 22nd floor without getting winded. Even the thugs who had bullied him before were knocked flat on their backs by a push he barely realized he’d given them. From then on, Lin Hao’s “hoodlum’s cultivation journey” went completely off the rails. While others cultivated by meditating and comprehending the Great Dao, he used breathing techniques to deliver food, making a fortune by completing 50 orders a day. While others fought enemies by flying swords and wielding magical powers, he ran whenever he couldn’t win, shouting as he fled, “Let’s see you chase me tomorrow when I bring a sword and slice your pants legs off!” As he cursed, the birthmark on his neck suddenly burst with sword light, cutting through his enemy’s steel pipe. Even when a corporate chairwoman was attacked, he charged in with a takeout box in his mouth, blocked a blade with his birthmark, and drove off her enemies with his hoodlum talk. Afterward, he still remembered to bargain: “Ms. Su, I saved your life. How about you make me the company’s first choice for food deliveries from now on? I’ll give you ten percent off!” But as the birthmark grew hotter, the woman’s words in his dreams became clearer and clearer. “You’re no little hoodlum. You’re the reincarnation of the Xuan Yuan Immortal Emperor, and this sword mark is a fragment of the sword you wielded in your previous life...” Lin Hao stared blankly with a cigarette in his mouth. “What? An Immortal Emperor? Then all those times I cursed people...”