Hu Tao's Tomb Raiding Journal: Buy One Tombstone, Get One Free

Genshin Impact + Tomb Raiding + No Romance

“Come back and explore this area another time… Just kidding!”

And so, Director Hu Tao plunged headfirst into a “brand-new domain” that could scare even Paimon out of her wits!

While happily “expanding the business” at Wuwang Hill, Hu Tao, the seventy-seventh director of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, received the most outrageous bad review in Teyvat’s history: “Ley Line passage, terrible navigation! So bad it threw the customer right out of the world!”

She opened her eyes to a gloomy, eerie primeval forest, with incomprehensible foreign speech in her ears.

No elemental energy to replenish her? Monsters (?) that were more sanity-destroying than the last?

Cars were “iron-shell underworld burrowing beasts”? Guns were “mortal versions of Vortex Vanquisher”?

The locals’ ideas about life and death were so crude they gave a professional the creeps!

Hu Tao: “Oh no, have I become an anomalous creature? Never mind, Wangsheng Funeral Parlor’s business reaches the stars and seas! (Not really!)”

When the Tomb-Raiding Iron Triangle meets an otherworldly Pyro berserker (and funeral home director):

Wang Pangzi: “Tianzhen! Xiaoge! Look! I found a girl who can use fire to ward off evil and even give zongzi therapy!”

Wu Xie: “…Did she just say that the banshee’s ‘service quality was inadequate and it needed a bad-review review’?”

Zhang Qiling: “…” (He stares at the Staff of Homa burning in Hu Tao’s hand and falls into deep thought.)

Hei Xiazi: “Tsk, that flame isn’t scientific. Little miss, want to buy some sunglasses? I’ll give you one percent off.”

“When the sun comes out, I bask in the sun~ When the moon comes out, I bask in the moonlight~”

Hu Tao, otherworldly edition, still singing off-key… just kidding!