The Weasel Asked for a Title, and I Said It Looked Like My Boyfriend

I accidentally drank too much at a gathering with my childhood friends, and was walking home feeling dizzy. Halfway there, a weasel suddenly darted out of the woods, stood in front of me, and bowed with its hands clasped: "Girl, do you look like a human or a god?" I stared at it for a few seconds, then suddenly remembered a web novel I'd read, and, with a burst of inspiration, said through a burp, "I think you look like my tall, handsome, loyal, and devoted boyfriend." The weasel seemed struck by lightning, frozen in place for a full half minute before recovering. "You brat, you just wait!" It uttered a harsh threat.