A Little Heroic Spirit Shock for the Multiverse

The plot design is very good, and the characters are also very fleshed-out. There are two small problems in reading it so far. One is that the author is not strong enough and is often led away by the comment area. The other is that gas explosions were abandoned and changed to live broadcast.

Why do Dragon Kingdoms appear in the end of these Holy Grail Wars? This is a deduction item. If I remember correctly, the black bullet should be the setting of the national villain.

Liangcao, although the writing is a bit clumsy in some places, there are many wonderful points, especially the command spell after the Grand Duke changed the master, which allowed the Grand Duke to perfectly display the name of the Impaler at the end, instead of ending tragically like the original work.

It's very beautiful, please give me some suggestions. Regarding the setting of the moon: excluding the servants, the upper limit of the moon in the universe is the planet level. Although various myths and legends boast about it, in fact, the more complete the setting, the higher the upper limit (the upper limit is planet level). The Earth in Xingyue and the outer universe are not the same system. No matter how strong you are in Xingyue, it is still false, but if you are strong in the outer universe, it is real. So for those heroic spirits, don't let them exceed the planet level. If you want to strengthen them, just apply a strengthening patch for the protagonist. Regarding the protagonist: The protagonist is used to substitute, so there must be a protagonist. My understanding of the behind-the-scenes flow is that the other protagonists can be human beings, but the behind-the-scenes flow may not be. Because the purity of the behind-the-scenes protagonist's setting as the author's avatar and the reader's avatar is so high that it is so abstract that it is even possible to discard human attributes and only serve as a doll that provides a sense of substitution. In short, I just prefer those with protagonists. During the game, I can hide for a while, but at other times I'd better show up.

It looks good. The protagonist travels through time and becomes the Holy Grail. Kyubey signs contracts with people from multiple worlds to become a heroic spirit [laughing]

Except for those few heroic spirits that were tossing and turning, the rest I feel fine I thought it was outrageous that the god king Iskandar came out again, and then he actually proposed to Ishtar. It can be seen that the author likes the conquering king very much.

It can be seen that the author has really played FGO. This is an important point. The heroic spirit is not the protagonist's younger brother and there is no god descended from the sky. Most of the characters who appear in the deus ex machina are in line with the human design. Except for the early and middle stages of Black Bullet, it is a bit difficult to collapse, but the ending is handled very well.

This is my first time writing a book. When I read novels before, I felt that I was out of books. I couldn't find what I wanted to read, so I wanted to write one myself. I kept thinking about it, but there was no progress. Until I read that others said that writing a novel does not require a lot of thinking at the beginning, but writing. So, with only a rough outline, I wrote and published it, taking the first step. The shortcomings are obvious, and the writing style is also very immature. But I persisted, and it felt incredible. 5 Points is not an evaluation of the plot, but an evaluation of my persistence. I don't regret taking that step.

The subject matter is very interesting and the writing style is also very good. I hope the author can stick to it and write more Holy Grail Wars [Eating Melon]

Author, I suggest that after writing this, write another one in fsf The Pseudo Holy Grail War, especially the appearance of the servants - Ichigo Twinkle, Enkidu, Youyi Hassan, Qiu Hai, Alexandre Dumas (I The suggestion is to make Officer Megure his master), Apocalypse or even Even Ishtar will appear. In addition, I hope that in the next game, Kazuma and 486 will also become The master and the servants can stage a game (for example, flash Flash) plot of abandoning the Master. Finally, I think the next one is better if Japan doesn't get too upset More, let some Chinese comics (like Ye Xiu in "The Avatar") and a Some foreign characters appear more frequently. Author, you don't need to be subordinate to the followers of the Xingyue World. You can also get other followers, such as the Thieving Demon Lord in "The Great Love Immortal", Eri Uesugi in "Dragon" (I feel that she and 486 have a good compatibility), Gao Yang in "The Lost City of Strange Beasts", etc. In addition, I suggest writing an EVA for the next Holy Grail War in another world. In addition, I suggest letting Shinji Ikari summon the Thieving Demon Lord or Uesugi Eri. In particular, Eriki feels that she can be cured by Kazuma, 486, or Shinji Ikari. If she dies, all three will collapse.