The Prince Was Sent Away for a Political Marriage from the Start, So I Led an Army Back

A prince is sent to marry into a foreign clan from the start, so I bring an army back with me.

Empress, why are you crying?

Ministers, why are you crying?

(As soon as I arrive on the grasslands, the khan wants to marry his most beautiful pearl to me and give me a thousand kilometers of grassland?)

(What? The grassland princess looks like Dilireba? And she brought 5,000 cavalry as her dowry?)

(Khan, no, no, father-in-law, I really want to get ahead. I really want to become emperor!)

(Son-in-law, the grasslands are cold and windy, nothing like the mild weather within the passes. See if this garment fits you? It’s a yellow dragon robe.)

(What? I’m taking my wife back to visit my big brother, and so many people are seeing us off? Why are all these city gates wide open? Why are they putting a yellow dragon robe on me? You’ve made things so hard for me, your emperor.)

What? Rebellion in Liaodong? Troops, advance! Pour boiling water into every ant hole for me, and split every earthworm lengthwise!

What, the Japanese invaders have landed? Come on, I’ll lead you there myself. Slap every dog we pass, and even smash every egg to pieces!

Come