Global Livestream: Are You Crazy? You Call This an Exposé?

The whole school is camped outside my door, just to submit a résumé for an alien

“Hey, classmate, does your research institute need any corpses? The extraterrestrial kind!”

Eighteen-year-old Zhang Gaobu skipped class for the first time in his life, only for the System to dump an “ET Starter Pack” on him:

Gray skin, no thumbs, and a skull big enough to work as a Wi-Fi hotspot.

He planned to keep it low-key and hide it in his dorm, but the moment his newbie protection period ended,

he accidentally tapped “Visible to Everyone” on his livestream. The whole school stayed up all night watching, and the comments filled the screen:

“Holy crap, this alien looks just as deranged as my calculus professor!”

He thought it would be a popular science lesson,

but then

The “Drake Equation” revealed twelve thousand civilizations,

and a beautiful professor had a complete public meltdown:

“Classmate, are you sure you didn’t transmigrate here from the future just to make a fool of us?”

The comments:

“I came here to call him a fraud. Now I’m on my knees calling him Teacher!”

“Streamer, don’t end the livestream! My mom wants to know why I’m watching calculus on my knees!”

“Qin Shi Huang: I kept that UFO ride so well hidden, and you still dug it up?”

And things got even more outrageous

Tsinghua and Peking University called in the middle of the night: “Classmate, want to transfer? We’ll even get you a degree apartment!”

The Chinese Academy of Sciences prep program: “Interested? We’ll have an academician be your homeroom teacher!”

Masters Chen and Su competed to take him as a disciple: “You’ll be our closed-door disciple, and the classical literature world will be yours to rule!”

Zhang Gaobu: I just wanted to find out whether the aliens were Earth’s “previous homeowners.”

How did I end up making the whole internet compete to become “alien research monks”?

[High-Energy Content Warning]

This book comes with a “knowledge buff.”

Reading it may give you a double personality: looking up at the sky and looking down to calculate formulas.

The aliens have filed a collective complaint:

“Stop digging! We haven’t got any underwear left!”