As a world-renowned endangered animal, I was a Yangtze finless porpoise.
While provoking humans one day, I successfully got myself killed.
I transformed into a human and now have to compete on a survival reality show.
I thought life was finally getting a little fun,
but then the whole world started hearing my thoughts.
My two-timing white-lotus boyfriend wants to use the opportunity to trample me underfoot.
On the surface, I'm secretly heartbroken, but inside, I'm thrilled.
“Come hit me! Hit me! Lay a finger on me and you'll be signing up for a lifetime behind bars!”
I go around cuddling up to people,
but they all avoid me like the plague.
Only the Best Actor is willing to let me get close.
“I hereby declare that from now on, you're my most loyal servant!”
“Gladly.”
