I Was a Low-Level Nobody in Republican-Era China

My name is Sun Batian. In 2016, I went home for the university holidays. I took the air rifle I had bought in middle school up the mountain and shot a few birds. I took some pictures with my phone and posted them online. The next day, the police came and took me away. They said I had shot a nationally protected animal. A few weeks later, the court sentenced me to ten years. My classmates all tried to comfort me. Ten years from now, I'll be a fine man again. Who told you to be so careless? You shot birds, then took photos and posted them online to show off. I had nothing to say. People embezzle a billion and get ten years, while I shoot a few birds and get ten years. I wanted to bawl my eyes out. Even Dou E wasn't as wronged as me.

When I was sent to prison, the bosses in my cell asked how I ended up there. I said quietly, "I shot a few birds and got ten years." They all burst out laughing. "Brother, you're a real sucker. We killed people and started fires, and only got a dozen years or so. Were those birds phoenixes or something?" They laughed so hard they could barely catch their breath. I had given them a comedy show, so they didn't give me a hard time. I'd heard that old-timers in prison liked to bully newcomers, and people said you'd spend your time in prison working a sewing machine. But I never saw that. Every day we either mined or worked the land. One day, while we were digging, a heavy rain started, along with thunder and lightning.

The rain soaked my clothes, and I cursed the heavens. "What the hell? Did I dig up your ancestors' graves, or steal your wife? Why are you treating me like this?" I had barely finished when a bolt of lightning split the sky and struck me directly. I disappeared along with the lightning, without leaving a trace! When the guards assembled everyone for roll call, one Sun Batian was missing. They asked if anyone had seen me. A few cellmates said, "We saw a bolt of lightning, and then he was gone." The guard said they were talking nonsense. How could a living person just disappear? I must have escaped. …