Journey to the West: The Fake Pilgrim

Wukong: "He's the only person in this world who treats me like a monkey."

Bajie: "Senior Brother, stop talking. I just want to lose weight now, or he'll eventually stew me."

Sha Seng: "Master is kindhearted. He can't even bear to step on an ant. You two senior brothers really want a beating, don't you?"

Great Immortal Zhenyuan: "As the ancestor of the Earth Immortals, allow me to call you Grandpa."

Queen of the Women's Kingdom: "I only wish to discuss the ways of procreation with the holy monk."

Demons: "Eat his flesh and you'll live forever, growing ever younger and healthier."

Tang Sanzang: "I have three disciples. One dared to cause havoc in Heaven, one dared to flirt with Chang'e, and one dared to smash the Jade Emperor's cup. They specialize in putting a stop to all kinds of reckless behavior. Remember, don't force me to act, or the consequences will be dire."

This is the story of a brash, hilarious, and shameless man sweeping through the Journey to the West.

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.