Saving Paper Characters in a Fanfiction World

If you can understand the following lines, then I think you'll be able to understand this book.

"I've castrated myself? Ridiculous, that's just cock-and-bull talk. I'm a man destined to become humanity's savior. Why would I be afraid of you? Ah, you're so strong. I can't beat you. Daddy Cao, save me!"

"I don't care if you're the strongest God of War. Take this: my wife Swimsuit Nobunaga's divine-attribute-specialist Ora Ora Ora!!"

"I still don't know what indescribable pact my unrelated younger sister made with my normie girlfriend behind my back that day."

"You genius idiot of a janitor doing the splits in midair! Today, I'll show you through my actions that chlorination can't save Honkai. No, what I mean is, players are the ones games are meant to serve. I don't play games to be treated like crap! Stella!!"

"I, Zhou Ke, would rather have no girlfriend and stay a virgin all my life than ever jump ship between nine ships!!! ...It really is great."

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.