Livestreaming as the Jade Emperor

What the heck? I wake up to find a woman sleeping beside me, and she's the Queen Mother?! I've even become the Jade Emperor!! And the most absurd part is that I brought a phone to Heaven!

What, there's also an outrageous iPhone 5? The more fish balls and followers I get, the more faith power I gain? And the stronger I become?! I can even exchange it for immortal treasures!

Now that I'm the Jade Emperor, I have to keep the monkey from beating me up in the future and keep tabs on my seven daughters. If some mortal sleeps with me again, where am I supposed to put my dignity as the Jade Emperor... Ahem, if anyone's going to sleep with me, I'll be the one on top. Besides, they're not my daughters!

What do I care about the Buddha in the West or Guanyin in the South Sea? Now that I'm the Jade Emperor, I'm the boss! I've got the System, so what have I got to fear? I'm the Jade Emperor, I'm the greatest!

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.