Hogwarts: The Romantic Life of a Sigma Male

Harry: Tiger, what exactly is a gangster?

Tiger: What do you think?

Harry: Weird-looking people? Strange clothes? Casting Unforgivable Curses everywhere? Starting bloody incidents? Going on about pure-blood superiority every other sentence? Never letting go of their wands? Surrounded by countless followers and convinced they're terrifying?

Tiger: Not quite...

Harry: Then what kind of person is a gangster?

Tiger: Someone with a higher education, dressed in a suit and tie, wearing a Gucci hat, an Armani trench coat, a Patek Philippe pocket watch, a Bvlgari potion pouch, and Fendi boots. Even their napkin has to be Prada. They smoke cigars and drink red wine, with elegant manners and impeccable style.

Most importantly, they have to be a good person.

Harry: Then what do you call all those people I mentioned?

Tiger: Idiots.

Also known among readers as:

The Tsundere Godfather and His Sweet Little Companion's Hogwarts Adventures

The Crude Godfather Who Flips Tables and Shows No Mercy, and His Scheming, Cunning, Jealous Snake Beauty

Professor Faye Wants Me to Confess

The Contract That Will Make Miss Squirrel Regret It for the Rest of Her Life

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.