Eagle Sauce: I’m a Conservative, Yet I Blast Trump for Being Too Conservative

During Eagle Sauce's presidential election, the Know-It-All King is shot during a speech, while the Sleepy King tactically drops out due to illness.

Just as everyone thinks the Know-It-All King has it in the bag, his former son-in-law Lu Ren loads the Failed Art Student template, activates the Prestige System, and announces that he will run as an independent candidate.

The election debate becomes a three-way brawl. Democratic candidate Harris is left out in the cold as the Know-It-All King takes aim at his former son-in-law, Lu Ren.

Know-It-All King: "How will you solve high unemployment among Black people and the rampant looting?"

Lu Ren: "The current Black Lives Matter version is too outdated. We should fast-forward to the slavery version. That would solve unemployment and restore public order."

Know-It-All King: "Anti-American sentiment is surging around the world, and Eagle Sauce's hegemony is unstable. What will you do?"

Lu Ren: "Put the Wall Street crowd of squid on the table and invite the whole world to feast!"

Know-It-All King: "I'm going to make Eagle Sauce great again!"

Lu Ren: "As president, I'll do just three things: crack down on crime and squid! Ban drugs and guns! Win the Second North-South War!"

Know-It-All King: "Honestly, even I, a hardliner, think Lu Ren's approach is way too extreme!"

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.