Three Kingdoms: From the Start, I Sell Myself to Empress He

My surname is Lu, and my given name is Bu. Put them together and you get Lu Bu. Because of that name, I was constantly mocked as a three-surnamed house slave, and it bothered me too. Maybe my parents had watched Romance of the Three Kingdoms and knew Lu Bu was the greatest warrior of the era, so they hoped I would be brave and skilled in battle too. After all, the famous saying goes: Lu Bu first, Zhao Yun second, Dian Wei third; Guan Yu fourth, Ma Chao fifth, Zhang Fei sixth; Xu Chu seventh, Huang Zhong eighth, and Jiang Wei ninth.

But I never imagined that one day I would actually become Lu Bu. This time, though, I absolutely would not be called a three-surnamed house slave, and I absolutely would not hang myself at White Gate Tower...

"I've told you many times already. The rebellion has nothing to do with me.

I'm just a civil official. I handle paperwork with a brush. How could I lead troops or wage war?"

"But I clearly saw you break a tree with one punch. And you still claim you're a civil official!"

Faced with the accusation, Lu Bu declared solemnly, "I really am just a civil official. As for those slandering me, I'll submit a lawsuit to the authorities."

Later historians recorded:

"Before ascending the throne, Emperor Taizu Lu Bu repeatedly insisted that he wasn't someone who lusted after other men's wives. He simply couldn't turn down love. And he really was a civil official."

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.