I Really Am a Foolish Emperor

In the twenty-third year of Zhengguang, the emperor and empress disappeared, and the whole nation grieved. The ministers cried out, "His Majesty shone upon our path like the sun. His departure has left the world as dark as if the sun itself had vanished!" The people wept, "There will never again be a mighty, benevolent ruler like His Majesty!" His old rivals could no longer keep their coffin lids shut. One by one, they pounded on them with loud thuds and howled, "That bastard is finally gone! Let me out! I'm going to conquer the world! Who the hell sealed my tomb with cement? I can't break out!" Meanwhile, Li Shimin was picking at his toes and staring at Yasuo on the gray-black screen, whose score read 0/11/0. Scowling, he answered his wife's question: "If they hadn't all ganged up on me, I'd have been back in the modern era ages ago. Damn, just thinking about them brings bad luck. Ugh."