[Help! My little sister turned into a tentacle monster. What do I do? Waiting online, it's pretty urgent.]
"My condolences, OP. Pfft, hahaha! What a cause for celebration, 2333!"
"I've got cumin, cooking wine, pepper, and Brother Bei's knife. Want me to send you some supplies?"
"Don't panic, OP. First figure out what kind of tentacles they are. If she's the magical-girl type, you might be in for a treat. If it's Cthulhu Mythos, let me inherit your Ant Huabei before your SAN hits zero."
What a bunch of idiots! Not one of them is any help.
"Onii-chan~~"
Hearing my little sister's sickeningly sweet voice behind me, I immediately put on the warmest, sunniest smile of my life and turned around. My sister, who had just scored a double kill, stood behind me, her tentacles black with rage.
"What's up, sis? Is there a new character pillow you want, or a collectible figure you're looking to buy? Or should I take you out for a fancy meal this weekend, or drive you to the forest park?"
My sister shook her head and gazed at me with a sweet smile. The tentacles on her body unconsciously coiled around the chair's steel legs, making them creak.
"I just wanted to ask my dear big brother: what exactly do 'capable little sister' and 'cousin you can marry' mean?"
[This is a question that will get you killed.] That was my final thought...
