Online Game: I Am the Overlord Flower

Well~ I sent out all my inventory in one go today. This book is almost finished, and the rest is the extra chapter~ You may have to wait for a while for the extra chapter~ Jin Zhu will take the high school entrance exam this year, so the extra chapter will be postponed until after the high school entrance exam. As for the new book, it will definitely be opened. After the high school entrance examination, Golden Pig will work hard and work hard! Ahhh~! Thank you all for your support during this period, thank you. Whether it is everyone's praise or criticism, Golden Pig will remember it in his heart. The good things will continue and the bad ones will be corrected!

Finished reading the big one! There are basically no problems with the article. The writing style is very relaxed, and the settings of the game and characters are also good. Each chapter has people's desire to read on. However, you can pay a little attention to the person. Using the protagonist's name as the narrative center of the full text will reduce the reader's sense of substitution, so you can use the third person more often to reduce this feeling.

The plot of the mission dungeon is well written, and the writing style is excellent among online game novels, but I hope you pay attention to some punctuation points. When you get stuck, you can look at other online game novels for reference. As for romance, I haven't read much about it, so I can't give you any advice, so... Let's just leave it at that. Anyway, keep going.

Come on, come on, support the Golden Pig every day

Hello, let's collect each other and cheer together

Some small comments. I have read about a dozen chapters. I can say that the overall plot basically revolves around the game. The plot in the game lacks a touch of humanity and may progress a little too fast. Moreover, the relationship between the male protagonist is a bit abrupt. In my eyes, I just met him and had no contact with him. Then he became possessive of the female protagonist. Moreover, the vicious female supporting role does not feel vicious enough and is a bit ordinary. In terms of emotions, I think it may still need more foreshadowing and polishing to make it more tolerable. It's easy to substitute for the angry feelings of the protagonist. Even when Su Qi came out, I couldn't feel the guilt of the protagonist missing his friends or even being estranged from him in the past life. The writing style should be of a relaxed type. The writing style is very outstanding and distinctive, but it still lacks a little bit of feeling. I can't quite explain it myself. In fact, there are very few dormitories from different colleges in the university, emm... I can't help but say too much, come on Jimei!

It feels very new and eye-catching, the context is connected smoothly, the reading is catchy, not obtrusive at all, and the writing is excellent. In the first chapter, the female supporting character comes out and creates enough hatred to achieve the beginning. Come on, author!

After reading a few chapters, I stopped saying polite words. 1. I read the plot of your chapter so fast! Maybe it's because I haven't read much rebirth articles, but the little Doudou's rebirth was a bit sudden. 2. The big colon Chapter 3 is marked with a semicolon! 3. Some sentences seem a little unclear to me. I can think more about them when writing. 4. Overall, the plot is very good, and it makes people want to read on. However, there are some details that need to be paid attention to. (Beep quietly: Can you please stop calling me chubby...) 5. I like Xiao Doudou's character very much. It gives people a warm and comfortable feeling. I look forward to the development of the plot in the future! Xiaolizhi, if you don't like it, don't spray it.

Huh... Basically finished reading it. The big framework is correct, and the world view is very immersive. Even a reader like me who basically doesn't watch online games can still feel the small world set up by the author. The characters are also relatively distinct, and the dialogues are not much. The later chapters are smoother than the previous ones, which shows that the author is still learning. I can't provide much useful help regarding the plot, but I hope the author will pay attention to the use of personal names. Excessive use of simple personal names will give the article a stiff feeling. All in all, the article is still very successful, good luck to the author!

The author's writing style is good, but the game content in the front is a bit boring, but the real world in the back is particularly attractive. Just change the punctuation. I hope you can work hard! ! !