My Life as an Arms Dealer

“Do you know who will inherit the Earth?”

“Arms dealers.”

“Because everyone else is busy slaughtering one another.”

…

Violence is human nature. The first human fossil we found had a bone with a spear stuck in it.

You say I’m a lunatic who promotes weapons?

No, no, you’re wrong.

I just hope everyone can live in peace forever.

That’s right, I’m a dove of peace. Don’t believe me?

Then do you dare raise your voice at me?

My job is to teach savages like you how to use idioms.