The Pill Venerable of the Nine Realms

On the first day after being reborn, my wife wanted to refine me into a pill. What should I do? Asking online, and it's urgent.

Not only does she want to refine me, she wants to take my cultivation and throw herself at her Senior Brother Chu?

Gu Changfeng: Thanks for asking. I'm at the Gu residence. I just drained my poisonous wife dry and hung my father-in-law on the city wall for good measure.

Seriously, can't you villains come up with anything original?

All you ever say is, "You worthless piece of trash," "Destroy your own meridians," or "Grind your bones to dust."

And what happened?

Gu Tianhong, dead, his head perched atop a mound of skulls.

Su Zhenxiong, dead, hung at the city gate to bake in the sun.

The Wang and Li families, dead, their estates confiscated outright.

(Aside: Gu Changfeng is eating Earth-Rank pills while complaining that alchemists are utterly incompetent.)

"This garbage medicine? Only you people would treasure it. Even a dog would choke on it."

From then on, there was only one sound in Qingyang City: Gu Changfeng's slaps.