“Dad, why is that dock up ahead moving?”
“Good boy, that’s Uncle Xu’s Ark of the Apocalypse.”
When the apocalyptic tsunami drowned the Earth until it was like a coconut shell, everyone else was still chewing raw fish on their rafts.
Xu Jue brought out his:
Apocalypse Takeout.
“Hello! Your apocalypse delivery has arrived! Mission complete! Raft expanded!”
In his previous life, Xu Jue was a hapless loser betrayed by his ex-girlfriend and treated like a walking blood bank by his relatives. In the end, he was fed to a sea monster, and they still left him a bad review.
Reborn seven days before the apocalypse, Xu Jue looked at his ex-girlfriend, Song Wanwan, and had just one thing to say:
“Your order has been canceled because your face is too big to fit in the delivery box. We recommend calling a tow truck.”
Spend points on a big bone to make soup? No, use the bones to reinforce the raft!
“Extra spicy” in the notes means long-range fire support across the sea?
On-time Guarantee means life jackets delivered with pinpoint accuracy before the tsunami hits!
From then on, while everyone else starved at sea, he pan-fried steaks on his raft.
Even the big shots among the Awakened who tried to steal his supplies were turned into memes when the “supplies” he airdropped from his delivery box smacked them in the face.
“This is our ‘Never Get a Bad Review’ combo, with a five-star critical hit included, dear customer~”
