Ancient Yayin

Run quickly. Still listening to the sound here?

The writing is strong and powerful, concise and lively, and the ideas are novel. Good writing, come on! ! !

At first glance, I just want to be a white wolf with nothing. What kind of juice should I give to a girl? Obviously the girl felt that he was not sincere enough, so he gave him diamonds! Give me jewelry! Send her to heaven

People are cruel and talk a lot of nonsense. If you criticize me, I pray to you.

Hahaha, why is it so cute?

Oh, you are driving again, you are undoubtedly a dirty rabbit.

Good evening and have a nice weekend.

This is a gay car... I want to get off

The first ten chapters were too smooth, with no highlights and no climax. It is recommended that Chapter 11, Chapter 12, and Chapter 13 be Chapter 1, Chapter 2, and Chapter 3. Then I slightly revised the first ten chapters and put them at the back. Or rewrite the first three chapters and add some climaxes. (You can highlight some of the differences between the protagonist and the people in the village. For example, you can reveal unique powers or treasures when hunting, turn the tide, save a mysterious woman, and then capture the monster). If possible, the climax should appear at the beginning of the first chapter. I have been a reader for more than ten years, so I don't write much. It's just my personal opinions. If you have any ideas, you can leave a message.

The names of the characters are all so advanced~ Come on, come on~