This Is Just How We Sorcerers Are

If you're struggling with poverty right now, joining the warlock faction might change your circumstances. Here are the possibilities you'll face: 65% chance of becoming a production warlock, contributing to the construction of our new world. 30% chance of becoming a combat warlock, fending off the attacks of the dead and protecting the Federation's peace. 3% chance of becoming an academic warlock, contributing to the construction of the Academic Tower. 1.95% chance of becoming a hybrid warlock, standing at the pinnacle of warlock society. 0.05% chance of becoming fuel for the Torch, lighting the way to the Federation's future. “Wait! Didn't you just say something alarming?” “Fuel? That's a metaphor, right?” “Nope. I mean it literally.”