Why Did You, a Royal Guard, End up in Heaven?

After reading the first two chapters, let's summarize the main content: The protagonist Shen Liang and his brother Zhou Ping carried out the tasks assigned by Jin Yiwei and went to Guazhou to get people. Originally, the two brothers wanted to get promoted and make a fortune, but what they encountered was like nine iron towers. The two of them were about to run away, but Shen Liang suddenly realized that a sampan boat could not carry nine big monsters, so they decided that it was an illusion cast by the other party. The two of them hacked the most suspicious tiger monster to death and found the body of the rare white tiger Qisu Monument. As a result, the mantis is stalking the cicada, and the oriole is behind. Luan Baihu, the Jin Yiwei who assigned the task, intends to come out and take the credit, but is accidentally killed by the buried explosives. The treasure falls into the hands of the bold and sinister Shen Liang. He also plans to put on Luan Baihu's vest and take up the post of Jin Yiwei. Let's talk about the advantages: 1. Shen Liang's character design is good, he is bold and dark-hearted, he has a loving relationship with his brother Zhou Ping, his interactions are not pretentious, and his writing style is humorous 2. The main line is quite clear. The first two chapters explain the origin, personality and world view of the protagonist, and then there is the story of his stand-in for the Jin Yiwei Queen, which has good extensibility. Let's talk about the areas that can be improved (for reference only): 1. The plot design is too rough: What the tiger demon stole was the treasure of the West Town Demon Division, and he was able to steal the treasure. The tiger demon was too strong in both force and intelligence. Even if he was seriously injured, not to mention that he could still cast illusions, as long as he had breath, he would have killed the mortal brother of the protagonist with one finger. It doesn't matter if he transforms into nine big demons to scare people. The protagonist says that they will never stop him. They are so weak that they can't defeat mortals. It won't leave. It's hard to imagine that such a character can steal the treasure. The imperial court is even more incompetent, and the combat power system is also very strange. The person who severely damaged the tiger demon was Master Qian (Qian Yi). I checked the information and found that under the Ming Dynasty guard system, the commander Qianshi was equivalent to the third-in-command of the provincial military region. The commander-in-chief Qianshi was the third-in-command of a guard (about 5,600 people), let alone the former. The treasure was stolen, and it was only the third-in-command who took action? And the third in command severely wounded the thief? Even if the guards command Qian Shi, they still have thousands of soldiers and horses, which can be converted into Jin Yiwei at least enough to besiege. Besides, Luan Baihu is a Baihu, so he must at least be in charge of some formal Jin Yiwei. This job cannot be done by the protagonist, who is not a peripheral character who is not a Jin Yiwei, right? The leader of the Demon Suppression Department personally took action to seriously injure the tiger demon, and then it was Qian Shi who was responsible for tracking down. Qian Shi arranged for his Baihu to lead a team to be responsible for the location, and he himself was responsible for the coordination. The deployment at this level is pretty much the same. Think about it, if the tiger demon cannot be established, the imperial court cannot be established, and the combat effectiveness system cannot be established, and there will be no feeling when reading it. 2. The description has a certain degree of conflict: Give a few examples: The two brothers rushed up and chopped them into pieces, and then said, it depends on a few heads. He originally advised his brother to leave, but why did his anger and blood suddenly surge? My blood was rising and I didn't want to think about anything. Why did I analyze it carefully later and observe all the details? My suggestion is that Shen Liang should not be designed to be the kind of person who chatters endlessly, opening and closing his mouth and saying "you are stupid", but should be designed to be calm and attentive. Let Zhou Ping be the gossip next to him, while Shen Liang silently observes the tiger demon and looks for the glimmer of hope. Shen Liang's mental activities can be humorous and out-of-the-box, but talking nonsense when doing things is too out of style. In general, the main plot is good, but the characters and specific plots need to be polished. I hope the author's writing will improve and the results will get better and better!