At This Moment, Falling into the Abyss

This is not a passionate story about "overcoming" depression, but a medical record about "surviving". It tells the story of how the protagonist was torn between the glamorous image of a student cadre and the shattered self-destruction in the three-year period from the third year of high school to the sophomore year in the repeated devouring of severe depression. He went through five gastric lavages and finally, on the edge of the cliff of despair, tried to grasp the last trace of the weak will to survive.