My Sister Can't Be the Evil God's Chosen One

I was a little disappointed when I saw Chapter 99. It has the shortcomings of Riqing's lack of focus, but it doesn't have the delicate emotions of Riqing. Moreover, the domestic novel audience is more interested in plot. As a different world novel, you have no driving force for the development of the plot. Obviously, the characters in the background have a lot of room for development. There is no complete main line in the plot, and I don't know if there is an outline. At any rate, I can establish a main line and a branch line. I can learn how to do single-player canned games, and at least try to see how other better novels are done. Biga, Whispering Poems, although I gave up on it long ago because of the many mistakes, but I made the main branch line, taking into account water characters, plot and emotions. What you wrote is a love adventure in a different world, not an urban love. At least you have built a good world view. The story of the princess at the beginning is very good, and the protagonist is not smart, but I don't understand why three heroines are introduced in one go. In such a small narrative space, without high-quality villains or supporting characters, and without major events, how to develop the plot and emotions? It's just general talk, the development of the plot of the classic.        ，，，，，，， Oh, when I saw the beginning, I thought I would be pleasantly surprised. It's really hard to find any good works in the harem of another world. You start with a very standard world view, saving the big shot and setting up a foreshadowing plot. It's very good, but you can obviously investigate the source of the family curse later. The main line, and then lead to various adventures for self-rescue, and then who is saved and protected along the way, encounters a big villain organization, deepens the relationship between crises, etc., Follow the traditional jrpg, or you can modify it yourself, at least lead to the main line, and have some inner drive. Didn't you find that You Yue's portrayal was very empty and abrupt? Didn't the protagonist suddenly lose his wits later on (suddenly helping You Yue, inexplicably afraid of the king and not looking for the royal family, and the king inexplicably protects his daughter and wants to settle the score with the protagonist (you know he is playing the old ghost fire plot) and does not help the protagonist, etc., This Tai Ri Qingdian Okay, I know it is to suppress the protagonist's level and avoid developing too fast, but why can't it be more profound or real, such as the protagonist's cursed family has problems, the king has problems, etc. You can even write down the influence of the royal family at the beginning, with the big nobles in power or write down the status of the princess) And why are there three heroines written in one go? It can be clearly divided into saving Iluna first, then adventuring for a while, letting Luvia appear, making her vigilant, and then experiencing the major events of the cult. After the resolution, the relationship heats up, and then You Yue appears. Besides, You Yue's label is also unknown, foodie? Obviously, you can learn from the creation of broken heroines such as Pancreas, Four Lies or CL, which makes people feel loved and want to help, so that the feeling of relief can be deeply rooted in people's hearts. Moreover, emotional stimulation is not just about crying and laughing. You can describe the swing and twist of the little feet, the changes in clothes, the sight of the eyes, words alone (for example: diary), communication with trusted people (for example: talking to the deceased mother), communication with people around you, etc. It is unreal to just cry or laugh. In the final analysis, I still hope that the book can be better. The shortage of books is really serious. I finally found a subject that I like, but the writing style and plot structure are not satisfactory. Alas, I hope the author can read some traditional literary novels or copy some writing routines, so that he can write better novels. Of course, if it is just for fun, treat it as if I didn't say it. Happiness is the most important thing, and focus on what you value more at the moment.

It doesn't look like a newcomer. At the beginning, I thought it was another classic sacrificial cultist and then started to make things happen. Unexpectedly, it was also a redemption and development story. The writing style and rhythm are not bad. I will reserve a place for you. I will update it well and I will not supervise it.

Investigation report: "Number"-593 Investigation target: "My sister cannot be the chosen one of the evil god" - the male protagonist - [Yaheng Katya] Investigation result: [Reincarnation (Awakening of Suhui)] Judgment basis: Abnormal traits: A time-travel investigator, as the name suggests, is a profession that investigates and records the time-travel situations of time-travelers. It aims to let observers (that is, readers) in all the worlds know in advance the time-travel situations of time-travelers in this world, and volunteers to provide observers with fast time-travel information query services If there are any fallacies, I hope to correct them ——All Souls Feast Zhenjun Stay on March 25, 2026

What do you think of the recent plot? The young author is actually a hard worker 😭 And all the big book readers, please promise me that you can support me for one more day at most♪٩(´ω`)و♪ Tuesday! Be sure to click in on Tuesday to add a follow-up reading for the little author! ! This is the most critical round of recommendations. Please help me! That's it, let's give everyone a bang bang bang as usual I hope you all enjoy watching it^_^

When the relationship between the protagonist and the heroine was warming up, he suddenly went to find the sister. When the relationship between the sister and the sister was warming up, he said he would go back to the heroine. The plot felt very disconnected. The first half and the second half of the plot were just like watching a unit drama, and there was no connection at all.

The classic sacrifice starts, and the classic attracts the evil god's physique. The characters are very childish, and it's hard to imagine that the protagonist was a social animal before.

Don't make the male protagonist look like a brainless fool just for the sake of a simple Shura field. He can't see anything and doesn't take the initiative.

I feel like the author went crazy when writing about younger sisters, infantilizing all the characters. The protagonist was a social beast in his previous life and now behaves like a childish little boy. The female protagonists also behaved more childishly than the set age. They were all brought down by the two younger sisters.

Just like the title, I saw that the time in the forest jumped to half a month and a half. After so long, the princess was lost and no one found her.

It's this kind of nonsensical way of writing. The inner activities seem to be humorous, but it looks really vulgar.

Some parts of the plot are too tacky, and the arrangement is unreasonable. It drags on for a few days to fall in love, and then the plot suddenly breaks out and it feels inexplicable. The system seems to have disappeared. Shouldn't we seize every opportunity and time to understand the system logic and level up vigorously when we know that the environment is in danger of life and death?

I don't know why, but there is a saying in common fantasy novels that "the wild path of the practical school is much higher than the showy way of the academic school." Is it because the author or everyone has never gone to school? Or did they all go to technical secondary school for three years or something, but never go to a major university or meet a good teacher? How big is the gap between self-study and being taught? Do you have no idea? Human beings gradually developed into modern society by stepping on the shoulders of their predecessors and constantly crawling and learning. Now, a person who has struggled and practiced on his own, pretending to be impressed by himself, can surpass countless generations before him? Are the knowledge taught in school, practice habits, techniques, ways of thinking, etc. All rubbish? Do you really think of yourself as Tang San? This kind of Homo sapiens who has high ambitions but low ambitions and talks about war on paper is the funniest thing

It feels like reading a novel ten years ago. The writing is okay, but some places are too deliberate.

Ya Heng is just Ya Heng, what is Xiao Heng? It doesn't feel like Xi Huan anymore! 😅

The plot is a bit childish, but the talent is good, but the rhythm of the story is sparse. Watch less Japanese and anime, where middle-school diseases and low-age are more serious. Just read it occasionally, and read more online articles. Your style of writing is more about daily articles. You can read 🐔's "Reigniting the Green Age" and 🐖's "The Poor Dao Goes to College", and Dan's "Starting with the Pursuit of Genius Girls", you can learn from it. In addition, if you like writing jokes, you can check out Chang'an's "I Became the Substitute for Mr. Right". His plot is the best that I have ever seen for integrating memes, mainly because it does not suppress the plot. Your writing is too fragmented, and the rhythm suddenly breaks out, and you start to become very violent Also There is a hook. To be honest, you have high expectations for the appearance of several female characters. However, except for the princess plot, the other ones are too bad and the logic is far-fetched If you are a newcomer, you are still looking forward to it. The first book has such results at the starting point and the talent is quite high. Please give it a try.

After reading it in one sitting, I believe the author is really a newbie. And the author is probably young and feels like a junior high school student. The current plot of the story is that the protagonist is in another world, and his whole family is dead at the age of 14 and awakens the memory and system of his past life. Continuously upgrade your harem to fight against the ultimate disaster. It has now progressed to the fifth heroine, and her strength has reached the third level. The writing is quite good. Although some of the plots are far-fetched, it is already great. I will order all of them. The princess, the princess' best friend, the two younger sisters, and the greedy eldest sister, these are the five current heroines. The sixth heroine should be the mad sister of the church who went to the north to fight against the demons. She should be a saint or something. The seventh heroine might be the sister of the princess, who is now fighting cults in the west. Theoretically, there should be nine heroines, if the protagonist's upgrade requirements remain unchanged. The next plot is to attack the best friend before the princess comes back, and then the princess comes back to open the first Shura field. Next is the plot of the church saint. The eldest sister will be more proactive and is probably the key to the protagonist's promotion to the fourth level. After that, the plot should need systematic guidance to advance. Come on, author.

The advantage is that the writing is very sweet, and the various twisted little thoughts between the young lovers are written very delicately The disadvantages are also in this aspect. The protagonist has a love brain, the emotional intelligence is too light, the novel is not a normal person, the character is flat, the plot is not reasonable enough, the plot rhythm is slow, the conflict design of the plot is stiff and cliché is not reasonable enough. There is also the feeling that there are too many psychological descriptions, which affect the rhythm of the plot development. I feel that the story advances too slowly. After more than 10 chapters, I feel that there is no development in the plot. How should I put it? On the one hand, it's fun to be brainless, but on the other hand, I don't want to be too brainless. I only express my own opinions and do not intend to control the author. My opinions are for reference only. I also hope that the author will write better and better.

It feels a bit like the villainous young master doesn't want the ending to be shattered. Is this you the cat-eared bell?

The plot feels very strange. I don't understand how the princess can be missing for 80 days and there is no movement outside. First of all, has the guard not been found after so long? How far can your princess run alone? During this period of time, carpet searches can also search the surroundings. If not, set fire to attract everyone. Secondly, if this princess is not insignificant, then in a world with high-end combat power, does your princess really not have high-end combat power to plow the land or search for people in related professions after she has been missing for so long? To be honest, there are not many plots like this, but no author would extend the time so long. If the opponent is strong, you can't run for that long. If the opponent is weak, why hasn't the support arrived yet? It doesn't feel like the princess's life is in danger, and then trigger the prop to send a signal to the opponent in seconds.

You ask me how I know? Looking at my original comments, I got one like every two or three days, and now I get a few likes a day.

The writing is okay, but the content is too canonical. There are a lot of plots that are very deliberately promoted. The protagonist does not look like an adult and hardly uses his brain. He knows that something big is going to happen but is unmoved. He has connections but just doesn't use them. There are also canonial props that shake people up and are useless. He doesn't go to anyone when encountering big problems, he acts recklessly, and somehow believes in his own guesses. His character is hard to describe. He is a bit like Asashi, the male protagonist of Riqing. He is also a bit sullen and silly, and he is full of surprises. He dares to waste his strength even though he does not have much strength. His ability to level up is constantly high and low. There are also a lot of problems with the supporting characters. The princess was kidnapped by a cult but was not found for three months. The heir to the top power who could lose control at any time stayed outside for a year and a half. The cult really has no brains at all. The evil god can be fooled by the first-order protagonist. The city is going to be destroyed but there is no protection. There may not even be a city defense force. It doesn't take a few ordinary people in a city to change the fate.

It feels like a classic beginning. He is caught with the heroine in a classic dungeon, and then the hero contacts an evil god or counter-sacrifice or something like that. I feel like I have read this type of book several times.

The author liked a comment saying that fetal transfusion is rare. The body is not yours, the memory is not yours, and the interpersonal relationships are not yours. The role of the protagonist is just a remote control to help others control their lives for free.

Higaru wears the skin of a game from another world. I like most of the daily life and battles (although there are not many). Overall, there are no big flaws in the rhythm and content. The only thing is, the author should not commit the taboo of time travel novels: the protagonist becomes an aborigine as soon as he writes it. Do you understand what I mean? The protagonist is a time traveler after all. Why don't you use your God's perspective? Why do you lose your mind when you come into contact with strange and famous people? You can write that the protagonist is aloof about feelings and women, but aloofness cannot hinder the protagonist's transcendent perspective of life in two lives. You, a social creature surfing the Internet library, have traveled through time (Awakening past life memories is also an essential time travel story in my opinion), and have you become a teenager with a mentality? Is this a bit awkward?

Why do I feel like the first twenty chapters are so childishly written? They have a Japanese air to them.

I spent a while and took advantage of the limited exemption to read the rest of the book. To be honest, I felt that the author was too obsessed with the emotions of men and women and the Shura field. It was a bit uncomfortable to write about emotional issues for several chapters. I hope the author can improve it in the future.

It's too stiff, everything is too stiff.

There are many female protagonists but there are too many, so I just wrote a few. In fact, if I don't have enough writing skills, it's better not to write too many. Three or four would be much better, and not writing well would affect the perception.

Why is it that the name of the heroine in your book is the same as that of the Whispering Poems 😅 I just finished reading the Whispering Poems and I was a bit surprised.

I saw this recommended. It has been on the bookshelf for a while and I haven't read it yet. Why is it restricted?