From Now On, I No Longer Look up to You

This is an inner monologue dedicated to all souls who have ever been lost in relationships and long to affirm their existence through loving and being loved. This book tells the story of how a woman who grew up in the emotional desert of her original family spent her whole life learning the attitude of saying goodbye and looking up. She once used cowardice as armor, used flattery as language, and cast a hard crystal shell for herself, but in her heart she always imprisoned a little girl who longed to be loved and recognized. She tapped tiredly on the echo wall of the outside world, hoping for a savior, until in the endless waiting and disappointment, she heard the sound of fracture from the core of life—— From now on, I no longer look up. This is not the end of despair, but the beginning of redemption. She turned around resolutely and embarked on a deeper journey home. This collection of prose poems is a detailed spiritual map of this inward journey. It records the shattering of the crystal shell, and how to identify the first grass sprout symbolizing vitality in the inner wasteland; it is about accepting the inner changes of the seasons, and about conducting a profound archeology and re-translation of core words such as "lack of love" and "cowardice". In the end, she discovered the true source of love - she became the long-awaited rain and the light that illuminated the wilderness. This is not a story about being saved, but a story about becoming. I hope this book can accompany you in a quiet moment to complete that crucial transformation: from looking up at the stars to becoming the solid and vast earth under your feet.