My Down-and-Out Sect Needs a Powerful Patron: Ancestor, Please Save Us!

Ten thousand years ago, the cultivation world divined the secrets of heaven and foresaw an impending apocalyptic calamity. The various immortal sects met and decided to entrust their most precious cultivation techniques, magical treasures, and hopes to Zhaoyao, the junior sister of the first sect, Xiaomiao Xu. They put her into a deep slumber for ten thousand years, so that she might save the world when the time came. But when she awoke, the cultivation world had long forgotten the prophecy. Her old friends were gone, the alliance had fallen apart, and the sect she had once been so proud of had been oppressed by the treacherous cultivation world until all that remained was a dilapidated hut and a few down-and-out disciples. Everyone could bully them. Grandmaster, we’re starving! Come save us! Zhaoyao smiled. Saving the world could wait. First, she’d stand up for her poor little disciples. Her eldest disciple only knew how to write bitter poetry? Poetry can only insult people, but read this unique spellbook and you’ll be able to kill them. Her second disciple only knew how to farm? Don’t waste your strength. Here’s a body-cultivation secret technique. One punch can split a mountain. Interested? Her third disciple loved fighting crickets? You love animals so much, here’s a beast-taming manual. From now on, you’ll never lose at cricket fighting! Her fourth disciple loved gossip? I don’t know what you’re good at. How about this guide to cultivating seduction? You’ll be the center of all the gossip from now on! Disciples: Grandmaster, isn’t this training path a little off? Zhaoyao: It doesn’t matter. After today, I’ll make the entire cultivation world beg us to save them! [Beloved by all + ensemble cast + comedy + face-slapping] [A female lead who’s sometimes “wise in her foolishness” and sometimes “foolish in her wisdom,” doesn’t believe in moral theories, and is convinced that the truth is always within punching distance & A shameless, devoted-to-his-wife top schemer who falls in love at first sight and is utterly smitten]