You Peddle Nonsense, I Go Off the Rails: I'm the Boss of Shengjing

[Transmigrate into a book + palace and household intrigue + pop-culture jokes + subverting expectations + utterly shameless] Feng Xi, a powerhouse from the apocalypse, transmigrates into a male-oriented son-in-law novel as the princess wife of its chosen hero, Qi Xiao. The princess is as stupid as a pig, selfish and vicious, and torments Qi Xiao at every turn. In the end, he has her hands and feet chopped off and throws her into Snake Valley to be torn apart by thousands of snakes. Feng Xi, who only wants to retire in peace: Got it! I’ll go be nice to him right now! But then: “Your Highness, the consort has been locked in the secret chamber for three days and nights!” “Your Highness, the consort has been kneeling in the snow for eight hours!” “Your Highness, the love poem you wrote to Young Marquis Mu right in front of the consort has spread all over the capital!” Feng Xi: ? So there really is no way to salvage this? Whatever, I’m already here. Might as well lose it and go with the flow! Six months later, above Snake Valley, Feng Xi finally stands on a cliff beside the heroine from the book. The villain says, “Young Marquis Qi, choose one: your wife or your beloved.” The heroine looks at Qi Xiao with tender affection, speechless. Qi Xiao raises his eyes and answers without hesitation: “Xi’er, come here to your husband.” Feng Xi, with a fake blood packet between her teeth and snake repellent in her hand, ready to leap off the cliff and run away at any moment, determined to live a carefree life: “?” If I jump down by myself right now, is it too late?