Shenmu Sword

Such an introduction tests the author's writing style and ideas🙂

Brother, you don't know how to write an introduction at all. .

Oh my god, this introduction is a spoiler.

Read the author's profile. I've finished reading this book.

Although I can't understand 🙂, come on

The introduction should be short-sighted, linked to mystery and profundity, and be more attractive, which will win the favor of authors and editors. In fact, the content is not bad.

The introduction is written as an outline and is quite talented.

Haha, my works, I am willful! This is a spoiler, so what? Hahaha.

Come on! Strong support!

Why hasn't the author signed the contract yet? 😶

This new introduction of the author is a bit interesting. It has a kind of heroic spirit that comes from within: "I am smiling to the sky from the side of my sword, leaving my liver and gallbladder intact"! 😃

Punctuation marks should be a little more rigorous. It seems strange to me that there are so many exclamation points like three. I suggest removing them or using them less, which affects the reading experience... If you want to use them, one is enough... 😑 There are also brackets, which should be used sparingly, like Prologue Three For the meditation mantra mentioned in, you can just choose a few sentences to mean it, and you can use quotation marks to segment it: "All living beings are troubled, and troubles are all suffering... Not dirty or pure, neither increasing nor decreasing..." "... Born in the formless, unable to do anything... The heart is as ice-like, and the sky falls without being surprised..." There are also things like (jing, qi, and spirit), which are too trivial. They look very low. I need to think of a word to replace them..."Spiritual soul" and "true spirit" are much better than this...🤔 In terms of writing, I personally feel that it is still a little lacking, but I ask The question is not big. As the author accumulates writing, it should be improved and improved...🙃 I will leave the rest of the questions for next time. Come on, Ollie... I wonder if the author has read the revised chapters and feels that they are much more comfortable to read?

I went to the author and fed me dog food early in the morning. What kind of food did you want me to eat?

In addition, the catalog is too lazy. Wouldn't it be fatal to give it a name? I have no interest in browsing such a catalog.

It is strongly recommended that the author make a reasonable layout of the content of each chapter, and divide the paragraphs into several paragraphs. Most readers read through mobile phones... Don't have a paragraph that takes up half the screen, or even the entire screen, which is tiring to read. 😑 You can refer to the paragraphs of other books and divide them into more paragraphs. At the same time, you can also look back at what you have written, and you may find some points that you have overlooked before... And when it comes to punctuation marks, be a little more rigorous...🤗 The above are some small suggestions for the author. What you have written so hard should be perfect, so that it can shine as brightly as possible! 😎

There is nothing to say about the execution ability of the author. I would like to give you a big compliment here. Here are some small suggestions. Please bear with me if I don't say it well or if it's wrong...😀 I re-read the first four chapters. After the revision, the reading experience is much better than before. It's much more comfortable to read. It's not like before, when you see a paragraph filling up the screen, which makes you tired just looking at it...😑 But there are still some problems. Let me talk about an obvious problem first: the content of some paragraphs and the dialogue between the characters are not concise and refined enough. A eloquent paragraph, like vernacular, seems a bit bloated...😅 On the contrary, some details of some environments and characters can be expanded and narrated, but they are mentioned in one stroke. After I read the previous chapters again, I found that, well... It's not a brief mention, but almost none...😂 The second obvious problem in this article: the lack of description and rendering of the surrounding environment, such as the Taixuan Sect in the Eastern Region of China written at the beginning. This is the first time that Taixuanzong is mentioned in this article, so I can briefly introduce it here...😃 And then to "Qingmu Feng" and "Zhangjiacun" later. Where Qingmu Peak is located in Taixuanzong, what the surrounding environment is like, what kind of buildings there are, and the weather changes in the chapter can all be described appropriately...🙃 Many environments can be described and rendered with a little effort, so that the content will not be too monotonous and straightforward. Simple words are like white tofu and need a little green onion embellishment! 😎 The third problem is: the lack of character description, the overall appearance of the characters in the article (face, clothing, etc.), Demeanor (the changes in the demeanor of the protagonist and surrounding characters in different scenes of dialogue)...🤔 For example: in the scene where Li Xian recruits disciples in Zhangjiacun, "a boy or girl named so-and-so", it feels... Too pale. As for the appearance of "Zhang Ziling", there is almost no description of his external characteristics and the content surrounding his recruitment of disciples. The above content is just my personal opinion. Please bear with me if I am wrong... In fact, there are many places in the book that I personally think can be deleted, refined and added. This depends on the author's writing style... I won't go into details...😃 ……………………………………………………………………………………………… The following is my rewriting of the two sentences in the article: Success, thousands of years of life. Failed and died decades in advance. If you succeed, you will live thousands of years longer, and you will be free and happy from now on, and you can look forward to the great road; If you fail, your body will die and your Tao will disappear, like flying dust, dissipating in the world. Other follow-up, if I have time, I will rewrite some paragraphs to provide the author with a different writing idea. I hope it can help the author...

In fact, there is another point that the author may not have discovered: the dialogue content of the characters is too long... This problem occurs relatively frequently. This problem occurs in multiple chapters, including the latest 74, 75, and 76. There are actually four or five sentences mixed with one "". Isn't it tiring to say it in one breath? 😅 If you split these dialogue contents and add some corresponding character expressions or actions, it will make the content of a paragraph look fuller and the characters more vivid...😁 If possible, the author can insert himself into the story and experience it personally... 🙂 It may not be good, but I still hope to give the author some help, come on, Oli! 😂

Suddenly the book is finished... Author, come on, work hard to write more exciting stories!