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Patriarch: "Shall I teach you the wonderful way of immortality, immunity from three disasters, and seventy-two transformations?" "Master, can you lie down after you finish studying?" Patriarch: "No, no. If you want to become a Daluo Jinxian, you must go to heaven to fill the throne, accept the priesthood, and assist the way of heaven." "Wouldn't that mean it's open all year round? If you don't study, you won't learn." Patriarch: "How about I teach you how to recite Buddha's name, chant sutras, meditate, and live in the blissful Western Heaven?" "Master, can you lie down after you finish studying?" Patriarch: "No, no. If you want to realize the Buddha's golden body, you must stop all thoughts, take refuge in the three refuges and the five precepts, and don't slack off." "Doesn't that mean you can't get a wife? If you don't learn, you can't learn." The Patriarch was annoyed: "You little boy, you don't want to learn this or that. Okay, I'll teach you some real skills! I have a way to fish in heaven, be a job worm and a salary thief, are you willing to learn it?" "Yes, yes, this is good! Disciple, thank you so much, master. I will definitely repay you for your great kindness in the future!" Patriarch: "If you talk about repaying your kindness, if you cause trouble in the future, just don't tell me that you are a teacher." --This is the story of a daily man who wants to be Bi Mawen. -------------- [Modern background, non-traditional urban immortality, a relaxing fantasy and fun story] [This book is also known as "The Jade Emperor's Worst Troubles", "Modern Strange Tales from Heaven", "A Mere Three Hundred Thousand Heavenly Soldiers and Heavenly Generals", "Tian Huo and His Divine and Buddha Helpers", etc.] [The background of Heavenly Court in this article refers to Self-proclaimed God, Journey to the West and a large number of folklore and myths, and some of them are self-made] [Pure author, pure sweetness without swords]