You Cry More Than Me

——Campus Narcissus. First person. Self-attack and self-inflicted. Spiritual bondage. Trauma aesthetics—— Resurrecting a dead body? [I steal other people's lives, but I go against my will to save myself from destruction? Jiang Jieguang (Italian brother) x Shen Jieyi (Xiaoyi) Hard mouth, soft heart, split right and sensitive, optimistic plaster, left Note: This article contains distorted self-perception and abnormal psychology. (But not much) In fact, this article will most likely not have a large audience, but it doesn't matter. If you like it, just read it. If you don't like it, I hope you find the article you like. Hypocritical synopsis: Shen Jieyi's suicide attempt was unexpectedly unsuccessful. However, the lack of success does not mean that he failed in the actual sense, but that he actually resurrected himself! He opened his eyes in pain and chaos, and became the young man named Jiang Jieguang - healthy, innocent, and wrapped in love. This may be a gift from God, immersed in the faint joy of new life, he can finally have a happy home. But where is home? Why is everything here so familiar? It turns out that this is not a new world, nothing in the world has changed. The only variable is himself, the sinner who has taken over other people's lives. He was horrified to find that there was still one of him in this world, and he had become his original neighbor. He painfully dislikes, hates, and fears himself; he is forced to lament, pity, and pity himself; he slowly embraces, kisses, and falls in love with himself. "We are overlapping parallel lines. I feel that I was born to love you." "I can live with him selfishly for the rest of my life with guilt, and leave the price to a world without him. As for the price, I don't care." Part of the text: ①--- ——I don't want to die. I also died once. I will still atone for my sins, but I have so many sins, so it doesn't matter if I am a little more selfish. I don't know how to describe the feeling that day very clearly. I did a lot of things in a daze and hazily. I went to class, went home, made phone calls, climbed out of the window... Everything seemed to have disappeared after I saw the blood on his wrist, and all that was left was the buzzing in my ears and the shadow in front of my eyes. I was suddenly very afraid of Shen Jieyi's disappearance. If I hadn't climbed through the window that day, after I got home and made the phone call, I would have gone back to the room alone and lay down on the bed shaking and sleeping. In the dream, I might be left in darkness, with Jiang Jieguang standing in front of me, with Pei Lianji beside me. They watched indifferently as I lived a hypocritical life, watching me deceive his parents and their friends, and walk around every brick in his identity. The work may not be so smooth, and the marriage may not be possible. Anyway, everything seems normal to outsiders. Then I die of old age, or die of illness, or it may be an accident. Anyway, after everything is over, I die as expected. Before I die, I fantasize about normal reincarnation, what might happen, and what I encounter. Then die. A lifetime is spent like this. At dawn, the sound of collapse and crying came from downstairs, and people around were whispering and discussing that Shen Jieyi had died. What do I do? I can't imagine it. Then I'll be a little bit worse. I want one sinner to hide another sinner in secret. It doesn't matter whether they live in secret or cheat, it doesn't matter, as long as both of them are still breathing. --- ②--- Shen Jieyi wiped my tears with trembling hands and muttered: "I don't want to die... I don't want to die, I'm just curious..." "Shen Jieyi." I murmured dryly, as if I couldn't feel anything else in the world, "What will I do if you die..." When you die, the whole world will mourn for you. Even I, "Jiang Jieguang", will pretend to feel sorry for you. You died, leaving me here alone, letting me live in Jiang Jieguang's body, but I was trapped in your name, carrying two people on my back and living until I was seventy or eighty? The only desk lamp that was turned on in the room seemed to be out of power, everything was plunged into darkness, and no one could see anyone. "100 Million cells die and are replaced every minute in the human body. In about seven years, all the cells in our body will be renewed. Your blood is flowing in my body. You can't let Jiang Jieguang live with the blood of the dead in these seven years. " I don't want to die. --- I showed two climax clips, don't call me a fraud. "Be content with content and always be happy" "Be content with content and avoid disasters" Destiny means: It is destined to fly. The daily life on campus is ordinary, but the time transition also jumps over ten days, or even a month. It is intended to describe occasional or specific plots, so it is faster. Intention: The world is big, but I am never alone.