What Could a Verlaine Kitty Possibly Be Up To?

Pairing: Ranpo and Verlaine, no other pairings. Chapters go up at 8 a.m. Check the notice board for details. Verlaine considers himself a lifelong sinner, deserving of being deep-fried in hell a thousand times over, but even so, turning into a cat for betraying his friends is a bit much! Ridiculous! But after beating up his friends, he really did turn into a cat: a fluffy, soft, cream-colored Ragdoll. At least when Verlaine was deciding whether to give up on treatment, his taciturn little brother Chuuya was drawn to the cat and cuddled up to him, rousing the last of his reason. A little brother who can understand cat language is the best! He may be a cat, but his powers are just as formidable as ever. A big brother is a big brother, and even as a cat, he can still provide for his little brother! But nobody told him his friends could turn into idiots, too! Verlaine worries that his amnesiac friend might get killed, while fretting that his innocent little brother might get his heart broken. What he doesn’t know is that his amnesiac friend is plotting to keep the cat all to himself... Verlaine: Paris is a mess, so I’ll just send them back. But I can send some money along, at least. Ranpo, darkly: Cats are good, people are bad, so why can’t he just be mine alone? Chuuya: Is Big Brother a cat god? The innocent little brother searches everywhere for a way to lift the curse. One day, he runs into a smooth-talker and has a sudden flash of inspiration. Dazai: Chuuya, have you heard of true love’s kiss? Chuuya: ...The problem is, I don’t know who my brother loves. Dazai: Nobody? You can make that happen! If all else fails, try them one by one! Chuuya: ...Can you really do that? Chuuya eagerly takes his cat brother off to find true love. Ranpo (Rando), who has been eavesdropping in secret, narrows his eyes and seizes the chance to steal the first kiss. Even if he’s a cat, you can’t just go looking for a partner at random! The cursed Ragdoll freezes, a thousand thoughts flashing through his mind. Verlaine sums it up: Seriously? Ranpo, are you out of your mind? Verlaine turns back into a human on the spot, but since his true-love meter isn’t high enough, he also gets a pair of cat ears. Something’s not right here! Chuuya: So this is what Big Brother looks like! He’s so tall! So handsome! I want to touch his ears! Ranpo studies him thoughtfully. “We really do know each other. Did you do something to me that you feel guilty about?” Verlaine grabs his little brother and backs away as fast as he can, stubbornly insisting, “We don’t know each other! I never loved you! Goodbye!” Dazai: Oooh! But once he runs more than three meters away, Verlaine turns back into a cat. Seriously? I can turn back again? How does that make any sense? Everyone is baffled, but Chuuya hits the nail on the head: “You don’t love each other enough! The curse won’t break! Looks like we need to find someone else!” Verlaine questions his entire existence and even wants to crack open his little brother’s skull to check that he’s all right. Don’t bring fairy tales into real life! Ranpo watches the beautiful Ragdoll keeping him at arm’s length. His corruption level shoots up, and possessiveness nearly consumes his reason! Dazai laughs until he’s rolling on the floor. This is too ridiculous! True love’s kiss actually exists, and it’s between two men! Chuuya thinks hard. “How can we break the curse? Big Brother, what kind of person do you like? Or cat?” Verlaine the cat sighs. “Little brother, stop making trouble. Cats may have nine lives, but your big brother doesn’t. Let’s forget about cats and people and focus on staying alive!” Ranpo (Rando) stares darkly. “The man is mine, and so is the cat.” To keep from scaring the cat away, Ranpo starts acting pitiful. The wary Verlaine stays cautious, while the carefree Chuuya is thoroughly taken in and actively tries to help the two make up. Dazai laughs so hard he can barely stand, thinking, I’ve learned something new. You people really know how to have fun. P.S. This is a fictional setup, so please don’t take it too seriously. The story leans toward serious drama. If it’s not your thing, feel free to stop reading. Theme: Stay positive and live happily ever after.