The first time Guan Yi met Zhao Yan was in a dark alley. The silver-haired boy was beaten half to death. He leaned against the red brick wall and gasped for air. He was so arrogant that he refused to say thank you.
Later he found out that this person was like this. Everyone in the company is afraid of him, and a look in his face can silence everyone in a meeting. When I get home, I will learn to knit a scarf awkwardly, and my hands will be covered with blood, and then I will say "it's okay" in an understatement.
After they got together, Guan Yi went to record a love song. The agent gave him a thick "plan" and taught him to answer all emotional questions in an abstract way: "I appreciate independent and kind people" and "The most important thing in relationships is mutual understanding." He memorized the manuscript at home every day and read it in his dreams.
Zhao Yan listened to those words and said nothing. He just discovered that Guan Yi said "her" more and more times on the show. And he is changing from "you" to the person that "she" can't pretend to be.
What he didn't know was that something happened to Zhao Yan's company. The hard work that went into it is being taken away bit by bit. Zhao Yan didn't tell him anything - he had always been like this, swallowing all the bitterness, brushing the brooch that he couldn't grab over and over again, letting his hair fall out in large handfuls, smoking cigarettes one by one, and then maintaining a superficial calm in front of him.
Guan Yi stood outside the door. The door was broken and could be pushed open with a slight push. But he didn't, because he knew that what Zhao Yan would not let him see was never the door that could not be closed tightly - it was the door in Zhao Yan's heart.
He thought life would go on like this. Until one day, Zhao Yan finally asked the question that had been pressing in his heart for too long.
After those words, everything changed.
——
A person who swallows all the suffering, and a person who has not yet learned to see.
This is not an "I love you" story. This is a "how will I know if you don't tell me" story.
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Intention: Being seen is the only antidote for those who endure