After My Nemesis Confessed to Me at the Funeral Home

【Updated daily at 9 p.m.! The second arc is complete】Thanks for reading and supporting the story! 【Short-tempered ray of sunshine x tsundere, cold-faced sweetheart】 Wen Shifei swore that he and his nemesis, Pu Yu, would never make peace. As long as he lived, he'd fight him, right up until the end of the world! Pu Yu glanced at the calendar: December 20, 2012. According to the Mayan prophecy, tomorrow he'd get to kiss this little cutie to death. Blurb 1 Everyone at the conservatory knew Wen Shifei and Pu Yu were sworn enemies. One was the noisiest suona in the world, the other the most elegant guqin. Ear-splitting noise versus lofty refinement, vulgarity versus high art. They'd been at each other's throats since childhood, sworn foes who could never get along. Whenever Wen Shifei saw him, he played “Grand Funeral” to curse Pu Yu. Pu Yu hugged his Fuxi guqin and rolled his eyes so hard it seemed Wen Shifei's idiocy might be contagious. “And what does the whole school not know?” The little menace Wen Shifei limped into the guqin practice room he hated most, stumbling in looking utterly miserable. Pu Yu lifted his cool gaze and met a pair of red, aggrieved eyes. Wen Shifei: “Carry me home.” “…” Pu Yu changed into a disguise, put on a mask and hat, and made sure no one would recognize him. He crouched down carefully and carried Wen Shifei on his back, holding his shoes as he slipped out of school unnoticed. Just as he had, ever since they were children. -- Blurb 2 Shengyin Academy was an elite high school for music, where everyone studied refined art. Wen Shifei was the only student ever admitted for playing the suona. His classmates wore suits and played the piano. Wen Shifei: “Grand Funeral” rang across campus. His classmates ate Western food and listened to classical music. Wen Shifei: “Grand Bridal Sedan” rang across campus. His classmates wore tailcoats for foreign holidays. Wen Shifei: “A Hundred Birds Pay Homage to the Phoenix” rang across campus. His classmates finally snapped: “Where did that guy come from? Can he stop assaulting our ears already?!” No one knew where Wen Shifei came from. They just thought he was sweet and pretty, though his instrument was way too lowbrow. Then, on the day of the school anniversary, a woman's corpse was found in the flower beds. Everyone scattered in terror, but Wen Shifei walked right up to it as if he knew exactly what he was doing and took the corpse's hand. His classmates were stunned: “!” And so the rumor changed. “Have you heard? He's into some pretty wild stuff in private... he works both weddings and funerals!” “Oh, that's what they mean by wild... -.-” Wen Shifei: “…” When Wen Shifei got home after school, employees from the embalming, funerary goods, funeral services, and cemetery departments all came up to greet him. “Welcome home, Young Master.” Wen Shifei's gaze passed over them and settled on a cool, haughty face. It was his lifelong nemesis, Pu Yu. Pu Yu was a prodigy from a family of guqin players, and he also attended Shengyin. He was the only person at school who knew Wen Shifei's background. The two of them fought at school and beyond; whenever they were together, it was a battlefield. “What are you doing at my house? Are you dying? Turn right outside and go to the service desk. Die today and get our 8,888-yuan end-of-life care package. The offer ends tomorrow, so hurry up.” For once, Pu Yu didn't argue. “Fine.” “?” Pu Yu: “Can I pick my care attendant?” “Costs extra.” “Can the attendant do anything I ask?” “Costs extra.” “Then I want the young master himself to take care of me.” “???” Wen Shifei only understood once Pu Yu had him pressed against a coffin lid and was kissing him. Hey, hey, hey! That's not the kind of care I meant!!!! On December 21, 2012, rumors spread all over the internet. The Mayans had predicted the end of the world. And the world needed a little end-of-life care. - 【Bonus scene】 A corpse that suddenly appears on campus, patients who pass away in the hospital, a charitable old person living alone... At the funeral home, people come and go, and Wen Shifei bears witness to life and death. When he turns around, the only one standing behind him is his nemesis, waiting to carry him home. “Is death the end?” “No. Death is the fruit.” Pu Yu couldn't help remembering his childhood, when his life hung by a thread. Wen Shifei had barged into his world, at the cost of losing a leg forever. Wen Shifei sat in his wheelchair, beautiful and broken, yet never resigned to his fate, like a willful little sun. “Then why did you steal my fruit?” “Because we're still saplings. We haven't reached the time to flower and bear fruit.” Reading guide: * The bottom is disabled * School story, music academy * Intangible cultural heritage guqin making and traditional funeral customs * Mutual healing, happy ending Wen Shifei, bottom x Pu Yu, top 【Pretty, spoiled, sweet troublemaker x sharp-tongued, secretly doting, tsundere sweetheart】 Here are character profiles to make it easier for all the readers to hire them on Boss Zhipin: Wen Shifei A beautiful, adorable little troublemaker who doesn't know how cute he is. The spoiled young master of a leading funeral services company, with extensive experience in funeral processions. Very extensive. Picking fights is his life's greatest joy. Disabled but determined. When the suona plays, gold by the cartload arrives. He spreads rumors everywhere that his nemesis is dead. At one, he picked a husband for himself during the traditional first-birthday object-grabbing game. Pu Yu A cool, pretentious immortal, a prodigy from a guqin family. Has a serious older-brother complex. Secretly pampers the person he claims to be picking on. Takes endless delight in watching people pick fights. A tsundere through and through, dripping with coyness and jealousy. When someone held the object-grabbing game for him, he grabbed Wen Shifei himself ( ). Secretly raising his limping nemesis into a spoiled little darling: a truly devious plan. Coming soon: 《Good Things Await Outside》 【Unlucky, silly beauty bottom x somewhat domineering, slightly unhinged divine top】 Jian Fan had been unlucky since childhood, the undisputed champion of bad luck. People said Heaven favored beautiful children, but he wasn't so sure! He always choked on water, tripped on flat ground whenever he went out, failed every exam, got instant noodles without seasoning packets, and even managed to rent one of the rarest haunted houses around... After two decades plagued by bad luck, he finally got lucky and won a scholarship, only to be told the very next day that someone else had taken his spot. He really couldn't take it anymore. Little Miracle Li is terrified of hardship, so let him cry for a bit. Jian Fan sat by the roadside, radiating gloom as he fed the Evil Sword Immortal until it was plump. “Hey, stop crying.” A devastatingly handsome man appeared before him. He called himself the God of Good Fortune, from the Good Luck Agency, and said he'd come to hand out some good luck. The God of Good Fortune confidently handed Jian Fan a business card. He was even a CEO. With an air of superiority, the god showed off his impressive track record: promotions, wealth, recovery from illness, protection from disasters. There was no bad luck he couldn't sweep away or good fortune he couldn't bring. Jian Fan: “So you're a janitor?” “I'm a god.” “Then why are you carrying a broom?” “My divine weapon.” “Does a CEO really do hands-on work at the ground level?” “...People like you can't be handled by my staff.” Jian Fan could only smile bitterly. He didn't believe anyone could make him lucky. Even the Jade Emperor couldn't do it. My bad luck is mine to command, not Heaven's. The God of Good Fortune insisted on taking the challenge. Jian Fan said gloomily, “Go ahead.” An hour later, the bad luck was as solid as a rock, and there was even more of it than before. The God of Good Fortune: “...Impossible.” Jian Fan: “Could it be that you're actually a jinx?” The god's face darkened. “I've been in charge of good fortune for a thousand years. Everyone I've ever met has enjoyed one lucky year after another.” “What about me?” Unwilling to believe it, the god dragged Jian Fan off to scratch lottery tickets and try every other test of luck. A day later, under the dark, windy night sky, one god and one human crouched miserably by the roadside. The God of Good Fortune: “How did it turn out like this?” Jian Fan: “Forget it. This is just how my life is.” The god thought deeply for a moment. “I forbid it.” He! Ac! Tu! Al! Ly! Forbid it! Jian Fan sighed and tried to comfort him. “Mr. Xi, why don't you find someone else? Don't let me ruin your numbers.” The god looked fierce, as if he'd made up his mind. “One last move: stack good luck on top of good luck.” “What does that mean?” “I'll transfer myself to you. From now on, you'll be my master.” Jian Fan was a little startled. A lot of images flashed through his mind. He glanced over bashfully, with a hint of something questionable in his expression. To his surprise, he felt a little moved. “P-Playing this big, huh?” Theme: Develop a healthy, open-minded attitude toward life and death