I was eight years old when I was adopted by that woman and I hated her.
She is clumsy and doesn't know how to cook and doesn't like to clean the house. She goes out early and comes home late, always leaving me at school and in child care. She also loves to drink and always goes to disco clubs with her sisters on weekends.
Within the first week of arriving at her house, I realized that I was not getting the love I wanted from her.
She called her friend and told her that she just wanted to find someone to take care of her until she died. She had money, but it was easy to raise a child.
I hate her.
When I was in the third grade of junior high school, she was already thirty-five years old. I always laughed at her for dressing up like a twenty-year-old girl in her thirties. She would always touch my head and say, kid, you know nothing.
She always treats me like a child, even though I have grown to be as tall as her.
That was the first time she got drunk. She hugged me and shouted another person's name. She cried and cursed. I don't understand whether she hates that person or loves that person. But I felt very sad. I seemed to suddenly realize that night that I didn't hate her, and I never had.
Bai Shengyang.
Every night when I couldn't sleep, I chanted this name over and over again.
White, Sheng, Yang.
Every word is filled with forbearing love.
How dare I? How could it be? She gave me a new life and I blasphemed her like this. I'm so dirty.
But, but love is like bones filled with bubbles, always popping up constantly, constantly, constantly.
Intention: Love the world, believe in love, respect elders and care for children.
