Fate update. The number of words per chapter is estimated to be very small. I'll put together the first chapter and leave it for later, and I'll work on the rest when I have time.
He felt he deserved to die.
He wanted to live his whole life in a muddle. When he couldn't live any longer, he would find a deserted place to burn himself to ashes and let the wind send him to all the wastes.
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"... I've been waiting for you for so long."
He wanted to live and love the person who had been waiting for him for thousands of years.
Intention: Seize the light