I Am a Mortal

"So you don't even trust Madam?" The gentleman looked slightly uneasy and did not answer directly. "I don't even trust myself. That means I can't trust myself, so I can't trust others. There is no other way but to curse myself." —— Natsume Soseki's "Heart" I know very well that I am mediocre, cowardly, selfish, stupid, and I have all the shortcomings that everyone else in this world has. But even so, I occasionally want to look out from the small window on the high wall. There may be Kawazu Sakura there, there may be houses with lights, or there may be nothing there. I want to believe, I want to be a member of "all living beings", live as a "mortal", and experience the beautiful, ugly, and all kinds of things. I can't believe myself and deceive myself. At the same time, I can't trust others and deceive others. I really have no choice but to curse myself, right? If so, what was the purpose of my birth? Ps. The first person is called the Lord, there is a third person description, and there are other people's perspectives. Mainly Qingqi, his writing style is niche and he doesn't like to touch lightly. Concept: The boundary between "mortal people" and "gods and Buddhas"