How to Find a Boyfriend in Qingbei?

Thank you @BUyu for the awesome cover provided by Xiaocutie First person Zhihu answer style, please see Chapter 1 for detailed mine clearance. The main text has been completed, there will be extra chapters dropped from time to time [Copywriting] (updated on 2021/12/31): The annual college entrance examination has come to an end, and an old question appears on the hot list—— How to find a boyfriend from Tsinghua University or Peking University? By chance, a clever answer became popular overnight—— I know this question! Just refer to the standard answer to "How many steps does it take to put an elephant in the refrigerator": 1. Open the refrigerator door (suddenly meet a boy) 2. Put the elephant in (finding that he is in the best high school in the city, hugging his thigh desperately) 3. Push it in hard/kick it/press it (wait for him to pass the exam) 4. Close the refrigerator door (turn him into your boyfriend) SO EASY╰(*°▽°*)╯ A few days later, in the midst of "What kind of whimsical and silly answer is this?" The anonymous respondent suddenly appeared and silently updated his answer—— Everything starts from my magical summer vacation in the second grade of junior high school That day, I woke up from my dream I found myself lying on the lap of a strange and handsome guy very softly. … At that time, I had no idea The male science and engineering general from Wudaokou Sports School who came to me is the leading actor in my life. And this bitch male protagonist will permanently deprive me of my dream of being a Mary Sue heroine. [Small Theater] (updated on 2021/12/31): Excerpted from an update by the anonymous respondent—— It was a sunny and windy day, and the old almanac indicated that it was appropriate to get married, pray for blessings, express love, and express love. I took advantage of him, removed his laptop, and threw him down on the sofa. Hooking his chin with one hand and pinching his waist with the other, his eyes narrowed into a boss-like arc—— Me (evil and crazy): If you like me, I will give you my life! He (laughing): It's not like you're here to kill me in this battle, but you're here to claim your life in Avada. Me (looking forward to it): Then do you want to muster up the courage to sacrifice your life for me? He (firm): No, life cannot be given randomly. Me (Nai Ji): ... Why don't you give it! He (suddenly in the second grade): Scientific truth teaches us... I have no control over my destiny! Me (laughing angrily): Then I will also take my destiny into my own hands and not give it to you. He (innocent): ... But I have mustered up the courage to sign for it, and I will not return or exchange it. No matter how much I blew my beard and glared at him, he lay still and leisurely, pointing at his handsome face leisurely—— According to the process, after the death, is it time to press the red eyes on the bed and kiss? Come on, do it quickly. No matter how much I punched or kicked him, he tightened his arms without moving, fixed me firmly and then calmly continued - What, the process ended early? Then get up and study quickly. I have to continue writing Bi She, and you haven't memorized a bunch of Level 6 words yet. Since then, I have never opened the old almanac of feudal superstition. ********** -White cut black green tea dog x sand sculpture sweet sunflower -First-person Zhihu answer style, light-hearted and sweet essay to encourage learning -Main high school, daily communication, for more detailed information on demining, please see Chapter 1. -Weibo (Ahuisa) has small theater drops from time to time, please pay attention Intention: Study hard and make progress every day