This story takes place after Mori Ogai throws Dazai Osamu's body into the river.
River God: Dear doctor, are you throwing away this golden Dazai, this silver Dazai, or this wet black mud Dazai?
Mori Owai: Farewell
River God: You are such an honest human being, then I will give you all three Dazai.
PS: Sand glyphs, no logic, confusing timeline, serious OOC
Purpose: The weak Xiaolin eats and broadcasts online