Daily one
Me: "Did you feel my heartbeat when you saw it?"
The dog looked at me like he was mentally retarded: "If your heart doesn't beat, won't you die?"
Me: "..." Did I not make it clear? ?
Daily 2
Me: "What did the math teacher just say?"
Deskmate A: "This class is mathematics??"
Me: "..." Okay, this is very powerful.