The Past Is Like Smoke

Many past events left an unpleasant impression on me, so I subconsciously no longer recalled them. But before going to bed, eating, taking a walk, or staring at the sky in a daze, the restless little things in my brain always like to surprise me cleverly. They work together to pack up the items one by one, and then stand quietly in line to look forward to my expression after unpacking them. I think they may have looked at my depression and couldn't bear it, and tried to cheer me up, but they forgot that it is a very technical skill for a person to comfort himself with memories, but for a group of single-cell neurons, their technology obviously needs support. Past one My childhood was spent in a garden filled with flowers and plants in summer, with insects chirping and butterflies dancing, and a herb garden covered with snow in winter. Tall poplar trees neatly surround the garden, like a guard of honor; the rustling of the leaves in the summer wind is a solemn music; the fertile soil nurtures tall vines that almost reach the child's chest; The ever-blooming wildflowers proudly display their wild vitality to people. They are golden, light blue, and deep purple. They have no elegant fragrance. What greets your nose is the fishy dampness of the soil, which attracts people to listen and bees to come in droves. In my memory, I still have the clear blue sky and the big white clouds; not to mention the dazzling sunshine and the heat of the sun, I can tell just by looking at the naughty boy's dark little arms. Not knowing how high the sky is, I always try to challenge the scorching sun with my eyes. Without exception, the result of being brave is that I can't see anything but black shadows. I remember that a playmate got a piece of red glass-like stone from nowhere, and when I looked through it, the sun was just a slightly dazzling red ball. That was probably all except me. The most interesting thing besides his sapphire ring was my precious sapphire ring, so I offered to exchange my precious sapphire ring with him. The other children excitedly persuaded him to exchange it with me quickly, because I had refused to let them wear it before. Maybe they thought it would be easier to try to trick him than to waste their time on me. But he refused to die. I was very angry and defiantly asked him to compete with me. Whoever could stare at the sun with his eyes wide open for the longest time would win the other party's toy. He hesitated for a while, unable to resist the encouragement of his companions, and finally nodded. He was defeated in less than five minutes, and I was left to persist proudly. I declared that I would break my previous record, but for some reason, the sky became darker and darker, and in the end I couldn't see anything. The doctor said it was retinal detachment. After hearing this, I jumped so hard that I cried all day long. I also made a lot of noise at home. I only shouted every day that I could never see again. The doctor was very embarrassed. My eyes have not improved since the surgery. With the way I look now, I might really "never see again." At that time, my father had a bad temper and disliked everything. The servants in the house were afraid of his father. As for my mother, I know nothing about her except for her photos. It is said that she died of illness, and there is another version that she ran away from home. My father was always silent on the subject of my mother. Even though I was so pampered by him, I couldn't extract a single word out of his mouth - maybe my skills were too bad. The doctor suggested what my father could do to distract me. This is the trigger for everyone to think of my blindness, the boy named Xiaopang. When I took him to find him, I found that the building was empty. My friend Xiao Shen said that Xiaopang was a cousin who came to his house for vacation during the summer vacation. After my accident, he wanted to come see me, but my family refused. Later, his school started and he changed back. "He asked me to give this to you." Xiao Shen said, putting the red stone that indirectly caused my blindness into my hand, and said, "This is the most precious thing his father left for him." I don't remember exactly how that thing got hung around my neck. My father said that since it allowed me to see the light of day again, it should be used as an amulet. As I was already in high school at the time, I couldn't help but sneer, Dad, you are also a state cadre after all. Marx taught us to adhere to materialism, so you should avoid those feudal concepts. My father choked me for a moment, and I took off the thing. The red blood-dropping crystal was surrounded by a layer of silver-white metal, in the shape of a lily. I knew that my father had made it with his own hands at that time. I felt warm in my heart, but I muttered, this glass is quite like the ruby ​​​​on Mother Fu's hand. No wonder the little fat boy refused to exchange it with me even to death. It is much prettier than the sapphire ring you gave me. Yes, my father half-smiled when he heard it, and he never forgot that my little sister was blinded because of it! I suddenly felt a little embarrassed. I laughed dryly and started to grind my teeth again. When will I be able to cultivate my tongue to the level of my father? But when I successfully completed my cultivation and came out of seclusion, I don't know how many springs and autumns the world has gone through, my old father passed away. I threw myself on the coffin with tears streaming down my face. The tree wanted to be still but the wind stopped. In the past, I only quarreled with my father and never told her how much I respected and loved him. Now, how embarrassing it is to be called my daughter! Stroking the red rope on the stone, I remembered my father's words. This thing was left to me by my mother, your grandmother. This was the most cherished thing in her life, and it never left her during her lifetime. Why does my grandmother cherish it like that? When I was a child, I asked puzzledly. I cherished my dolls and bicycles, but I never left them. My father smiled and patted my face. Little sister, that's because your love for the doll is not deep enough. You must know that some people and some things require us to love with all our lives. I wrinkled my little face and thought for a long time but still couldn't imagine that there was anything more worthy of my love than a doll. My father comforted me, "Don't worry, little sister, you have another lifetime to discover, I think that's enough." It's not enough, father, I have found it now, but where are you?