This article is a very scientific article on cultivating immortality.
Mainly plot. It is very scientific. There is absolutely no plot where the protagonist has to kill all the way through the level or brainless murder and treasure grabbing, and there is no inexplicable inheritance or robbery by force. Each realm cultivation spell has its detailed explanation and an in-depth exploration of the mystery of Qi. The villain is no longer a soy sauce, and even has an independent background story. There are many scenes and most of the very powerful and good things are with the villain and the protagonist cannot take them away. They often play with and beat the protagonist for fun.
At the same time, there are many characters. The protagonist has many partners and is by no means just a bunch of people. The protagonist has a certain hidden background but is not invincible. Also, the protagonists do not have golden fingers, are not all-rounders, and are not counterattacks. And the most important point is that this is a fairy tale novel written from the perspective of the protagonist. The protagonists are just living beings in this infinite world. Therefore, the world will not revolve around the protagonist and will not do any inexplicable things for the protagonist. Remember.
At the same time, this article is about Lara Ven with a single-minded relationship, no harem, and no Mary Sue.
If you are interested, click here to take a look.
Conception:
Reader comments
Come on
Come on, little sister
If you irrigate the plant with nutrient solution, will it grow a million-dollar plant? !
First of all, my views only represent my personal views. Maybe it's because I don't see much of this type of writing, so I just give my opinion. I'm not a writing guide, I'm just giving suggestions! ! When I say "must", please automatically replace it with something like this when reading. It may be better to write it like this.
1. I feel that this is more important. Let me mention it earlier, it is the writing style (should it be included in this? It may also be a matter of description habits, but that's what it means). Reading it gives me the feeling of running a running account or writing a diary, not like telling a story.
It is difficult to change this aspect, but it is very important. It affects whether readers can continue reading and whether they can retain people (it is recommended that you try to change it at the beginning to trick people into a trap~)
Give a few examples
① When switching scenes/perspectives in the same chapter, you can use dividing lines, which not only serve as reminders, but also look cleaner;
② You can describe the scene more, don't mention it in one sentence (to heighten the atmosphere and reflect the details, readers need to feel involved and get involved in the drama);
③ Write more about the protagonist's psychological activities (to prevent the protagonist's actions from seeming inexplicable);
④ Avoid the whole article being filled with nonsensical dialogues. What if you want to write a very grand world, but the main characters are arranged in a dull way? So maybe I want to write less serious, but this is too much, and it is very plain and has no content. It is just for the sake of being silly. If you want to create a silly character, you can insert some into the plot, but don't set the plot and dialogue for the sake of being funny. At least I don't find it funny.
2. In fact, the following can be considered as extensions and supplements to the first point.
First of all, this is an imaginary world, so everything about you is constructed by you. Whether it is identity, power, maps, products, etc., It must comply with basic logic. People are not symbols and have their own thoughts. Don't suddenly create two people just to write a plot. It feels like There is some facial expression, that is, looking at a person seems to be a label. After giving him a label, there is only this label. People are very complex and can have the most important things, but it does not mean that nothing else exists (I don't know if you can understand what I want to say, facepalm)
3. The plot advances too fast. It feels like it is advanced in order to advance the plot. In the end, it feels like nothing is explained clearly (especially at the beginning, if you don't intersperse popular science into the plot to explain clearly, at least explain some of the most basic things, the reader will look confused) and some plots are inexplicable.
Examples can also be given here
① You created a particularly powerful force at the beginning, and even held a conference. You also wrote a lot of words to describe it. However, because it involved the heroine, you started to introduce the heroine. The content of the conference was not mentioned at all... Not at all...
Here we either simply click on the content of the conference, which is very suitable for inserting world views, or we don't mention the policies of the conference and directly describe the scene of the heroine meeting here. Then because she is a high-level wage earner, she just follows orders, so she spends the whole meeting in a daze, bypassing the conference, and so on. Explain clearly, don't start with an anticlimax, and once you write it, don't let it turn into nonsense. The readers are also confused.
Come on
It can be simpler! A bit chatty!
I almost didn't finish what I said last time. After you explained it, I felt that I didn't know how to say it. The words didn't express what I meant. But I've written it down, so I might as well send it out. You can take a look.
1. It is the relationship between the technology side and the cultivation side mentioned earlier. This relationship must be reflected in every aspect of daily life. I hope you can weigh it carefully and don't treat the previous ones carefully just because the subsequent plot has just begun. It feels like the plot starts after you have been saying don't enter. So what is the purpose of the previous one? And if I can't keep people in front of me, at least I personally can't stand it anymore. I feel that there are too many bugs (including private settings that you have not written out. Since it is a private setting, you should write it out, or if you think it is not good to have too many introductions at the beginning, then at least the writing does not feel inconsistent. There is still a problem of the plot advancing too fast. If you have a lot of private settings, you should not advance so fast. Slow down the pace and slowly popularize science. The time when they go out is very suitable.
Instead of pushing it all to the back, or you can change the rhythm of the narrative, just write the don't go into the paragraph at the beginning, and then insert the world view in flashback) It's not like I can just ignore it and ignore it.
I have felt that this problem is very serious since Wang appeared. I feel that you have not thought about what the life of a richest man should be like. Otherwise, like me, I think their daily facilities are very problematic. Since the richest mortals can afford cultivation-side transportation, why are the equipment inside completely technology-side? Why did the escort team only clear one cultivator? If she was so rich, why didn't she hire a few more? If we can't afford cultivators, why can we use Qing? If her defense was so weak, how did she become the richest man? Is it inherited in the family? I think if she plays like this, she will be taken away and used as a meat ticket in a matter of minutes.
2. Personality. I don't know if it's because I haven't seen this kind of thing too often. I feel that the characters written are very superficial, like a label, and they are always emphasized with dialogues and the like, which is too much.
I think Qing gave me the feeling of split personality. Is she not interested in the outside world? Why are you so interested but don't seem to have any psychological fluctuations? If you are not interested, why do you frown, shake your head, laugh, etc., And also emphasize that you have never laughed before...
The same goes for Wang's character design. You should want to write that the scheming is not exposed at the beginning, and then reverse it later. The prerequisite for pretending to be a pig and eating the tiger is that you really won't be eaten. I can't feel her security at all. It all depends on luck. Is this really scheming?
3. The combat power setting is confusing. What is the level of Wang's strength and Qing's strength? This will be reflected in every battle, but I think it is not written out. There are three battles in the first five chapters, and each time it happens, it makes me more confused.
4. I am also very curious about this, which is why two people crash-landed on a planet that Wang knew about, and they knew it so clearly.
5. There is a restaurant on this planet, but as soon as I left, I walked to a small forest. Is this a rural setting... Aren't I going to rent a hotel? And there is no transportation? Wrong frequency to martial arts again.
Is it so exciting?
I finally saw my mother-in-law... I always thought she had a queen-shaped forehead, but she turned out to be a cute girl... (O^^o)
It's really awesome, it will reach Chapter 600 immediately.
Come on
It seems that there are more awesome people than Sanqing. I can't remember clearly.
Long time no see, almost 600 chapters, scary, admirable
Come on
Papaya Fire Dragon: I was raised by my stepmother...
And the monkeys and pigs... Haha
I made a "hey hey hey" sound
I just want to know if this is the legendary national treasure giant panda... Laughing and crying
I really want to know whether the editor did not find Dada, or Dada just wants to benefit the public for free,
完结撒花?超好看！！
I haven't watched it for a while, and there have been so many more updates. It's so awesome, come on!
Try to update
Come on, I've been working too much overtime lately... I fall asleep every time I watch it, and I haven't left any comments.
Absolutely
It probably hasn't been swallowed. This is the sixth comment I posted today. It seems that if it has been swallowed, please tell me and I will repost it (actually, I am just trying to accumulate points).
Recommended by friends, collect it first
I was so awesome at the beginning, but suddenly I changed to another awesome one. The previous one stopped abruptly, and it looked very sloppy (I had a hunch that I was going to use a lot of squiggles)
② First of all, when accepting the task, a long description gave people the feeling of being cold and emotionless. As a result, she frowned when she saw the task target. So why did this person make her frown? You can insert a description in the narration here, so that it is possible It would be better than always highlighting how bold and arrogant she is later on, and it would feel too exaggerated. (Of course, if you want to have a different kind of first meeting, it doesn't stop you from writing like this. You can just write that you are rich and you are lustful and casual. After all, rumors about lust are not as deep as personal experience.)
③This is really important.
"And the belt around her waist seems to be telling others ~ Don't stop me." This kind of ancient pretense is no longer popular. It makes me scratch my toes. You can write that others saw this magical belt, explain what the belt represents, and then write that you are curious about which big boss it is, but you don't dare to provoke silently give way. You always feel that you are deliberately pretending, but he is obviously a cold killer. There is no fluctuation when seeing that the target of the mission is the richest man in the Southern Region.
And when she saw the carriage, she shook her head. Why on earth was she shaking her head? Not written here. Why is a killer who looks so cold on the outside shaking his head? (This may be because you want to write about their entanglement later, so you can also add a psychological description so that people can tell at a glance, wow, is there something fishy between these two?)
In short, the plot should not be too abrupt.
Speaking of which, there was another one, a belt man came, but the younger brother directly asked her to walk to the boss's carriage and was ready to get on? ? ? Is this security serious? ? Can she really live to this point? The status of the richest man is very Schrödinger. She was able to find Qing to do guard work, but her younger brother didn't dare to stop her. She herself knew where the guard came from. It's strange that she is so arrogant and her subordinates are so humble.
④Chapter 2: Let's set off. I clicked on the scenery of the universe at first, nothing wrong with it, and then started teasing and being teased (I haven't had time to read the specific wording), and then the enemy attacked while teasing. There is a problem here. One, during the teasing, you just set off from the door, right? Is the defense force at the doorstep so poor? ? That's a bit too cool. After all, it's the capital planet. It's doing so poorly. It's a slap in the face. (If it's a wormhole jump or something like this, please be sure to point it out. "I saw here that it was mentioned later that it broke away from the ruling area. Then it's best to tell me why the ruling area broke away so quickly. I It feels like a teasing skill. The timeline must be clear. It does not necessarily use time to advance the plot, but the basic time should still be marked and highlighted. If not, please be sure to click on it. It has been flying for a few days, or you did not expect the timeline. You can change the teasing into daily life)
Next, the richest man uses a carriage on his way? ? Moreover, the two people seemed to be sitting very close to each other, which gave me the feeling that the space was very small. If there is room for expansion, please click here. If this is cultivation later, then why don't you bring something into cultivation? ? Moreover, how the carriage flies must be marked, such as whether it is being pulled by a horse or a bird.
Come on come on
It's really awesome (? ??_??)?, It's so long, can I write thousands of chapters?
Where is the yandere girl Xiao Jiangjiang! It hasn't made its debut yet
Come on
Come on, little sister
If you irrigate the plant with nutrient solution, will it grow a million-dollar plant? !
First of all, my views only represent my personal views. Maybe it's because I don't see much of this type of writing, so I just give my opinion. I'm not a writing guide, I'm just giving suggestions! ! When I say "must", please automatically replace it with something like this when reading. It may be better to write it like this. 1. I feel that this is more important. Let me mention it earlier, it is the writing style (should it be included in this? It may also be a matter of description habits, but that's what it means). Reading it gives me the feeling of running a running account or writing a diary, not like telling a story. It is difficult to change this aspect, but it is very important. It affects whether readers can continue reading and whether they can retain people (it is recommended that you try to change it at the beginning to trick people into a trap~) Give a few examples ① When switching scenes/perspectives in the same chapter, you can use dividing lines, which not only serve as reminders, but also look cleaner; ② You can describe the scene more, don't mention it in one sentence (to heighten the atmosphere and reflect the details, readers need to feel involved and get involved in the drama); ③ Write more about the protagonist's psychological activities (to prevent the protagonist's actions from seeming inexplicable); ④ Avoid the whole article being filled with nonsensical dialogues. What if you want to write a very grand world, but the main characters are arranged in a dull way? So maybe I want to write less serious, but this is too much, and it is very plain and has no content. It is just for the sake of being silly. If you want to create a silly character, you can insert some into the plot, but don't set the plot and dialogue for the sake of being funny. At least I don't find it funny. 2. In fact, the following can be considered as extensions and supplements to the first point. First of all, this is an imaginary world, so everything about you is constructed by you. Whether it is identity, power, maps, products, etc., It must comply with basic logic. People are not symbols and have their own thoughts. Don't suddenly create two people just to write a plot. It feels like There is some facial expression, that is, looking at a person seems to be a label. After giving him a label, there is only this label. People are very complex and can have the most important things, but it does not mean that nothing else exists (I don't know if you can understand what I want to say, facepalm) 3. The plot advances too fast. It feels like it is advanced in order to advance the plot. In the end, it feels like nothing is explained clearly (especially at the beginning, if you don't intersperse popular science into the plot to explain clearly, at least explain some of the most basic things, the reader will look confused) and some plots are inexplicable. Examples can also be given here ① You created a particularly powerful force at the beginning, and even held a conference. You also wrote a lot of words to describe it. However, because it involved the heroine, you started to introduce the heroine. The content of the conference was not mentioned at all... Not at all... Here we either simply click on the content of the conference, which is very suitable for inserting world views, or we don't mention the policies of the conference and directly describe the scene of the heroine meeting here. Then because she is a high-level wage earner, she just follows orders, so she spends the whole meeting in a daze, bypassing the conference, and so on. Explain clearly, don't start with an anticlimax, and once you write it, don't let it turn into nonsense. The readers are also confused.
Come on
It can be simpler! A bit chatty!
I almost didn't finish what I said last time. After you explained it, I felt that I didn't know how to say it. The words didn't express what I meant. But I've written it down, so I might as well send it out. You can take a look. 1. It is the relationship between the technology side and the cultivation side mentioned earlier. This relationship must be reflected in every aspect of daily life. I hope you can weigh it carefully and don't treat the previous ones carefully just because the subsequent plot has just begun. It feels like the plot starts after you have been saying don't enter. So what is the purpose of the previous one? And if I can't keep people in front of me, at least I personally can't stand it anymore. I feel that there are too many bugs (including private settings that you have not written out. Since it is a private setting, you should write it out, or if you think it is not good to have too many introductions at the beginning, then at least the writing does not feel inconsistent. There is still a problem of the plot advancing too fast. If you have a lot of private settings, you should not advance so fast. Slow down the pace and slowly popularize science. The time when they go out is very suitable. Instead of pushing it all to the back, or you can change the rhythm of the narrative, just write the don't go into the paragraph at the beginning, and then insert the world view in flashback) It's not like I can just ignore it and ignore it. I have felt that this problem is very serious since Wang appeared. I feel that you have not thought about what the life of a richest man should be like. Otherwise, like me, I think their daily facilities are very problematic. Since the richest mortals can afford cultivation-side transportation, why are the equipment inside completely technology-side? Why did the escort team only clear one cultivator? If she was so rich, why didn't she hire a few more? If we can't afford cultivators, why can we use Qing? If her defense was so weak, how did she become the richest man? Is it inherited in the family? I think if she plays like this, she will be taken away and used as a meat ticket in a matter of minutes. 2. Personality. I don't know if it's because I haven't seen this kind of thing too often. I feel that the characters written are very superficial, like a label, and they are always emphasized with dialogues and the like, which is too much. I think Qing gave me the feeling of split personality. Is she not interested in the outside world? Why are you so interested but don't seem to have any psychological fluctuations? If you are not interested, why do you frown, shake your head, laugh, etc., And also emphasize that you have never laughed before... The same goes for Wang's character design. You should want to write that the scheming is not exposed at the beginning, and then reverse it later. The prerequisite for pretending to be a pig and eating the tiger is that you really won't be eaten. I can't feel her security at all. It all depends on luck. Is this really scheming? 3. The combat power setting is confusing. What is the level of Wang's strength and Qing's strength? This will be reflected in every battle, but I think it is not written out. There are three battles in the first five chapters, and each time it happens, it makes me more confused. 4. I am also very curious about this, which is why two people crash-landed on a planet that Wang knew about, and they knew it so clearly. 5. There is a restaurant on this planet, but as soon as I left, I walked to a small forest. Is this a rural setting... Aren't I going to rent a hotel? And there is no transportation? Wrong frequency to martial arts again.
Is it so exciting?
I finally saw my mother-in-law... I always thought she had a queen-shaped forehead, but she turned out to be a cute girl... (O^^o)
It's really awesome, it will reach Chapter 600 immediately.
Come on
It seems that there are more awesome people than Sanqing. I can't remember clearly.
Long time no see, almost 600 chapters, scary, admirable
Come on
Papaya Fire Dragon: I was raised by my stepmother...
And the monkeys and pigs... Haha
I made a "hey hey hey" sound
I just want to know if this is the legendary national treasure giant panda... Laughing and crying
I really want to know whether the editor did not find Dada, or Dada just wants to benefit the public for free,
完结撒花?超好看！！
I haven't watched it for a while, and there have been so many more updates. It's so awesome, come on!
Try to update
Come on, I've been working too much overtime lately... I fall asleep every time I watch it, and I haven't left any comments.
Absolutely
It probably hasn't been swallowed. This is the sixth comment I posted today. It seems that if it has been swallowed, please tell me and I will repost it (actually, I am just trying to accumulate points).
Recommended by friends, collect it first
I was so awesome at the beginning, but suddenly I changed to another awesome one. The previous one stopped abruptly, and it looked very sloppy (I had a hunch that I was going to use a lot of squiggles) ② First of all, when accepting the task, a long description gave people the feeling of being cold and emotionless. As a result, she frowned when she saw the task target. So why did this person make her frown? You can insert a description in the narration here, so that it is possible It would be better than always highlighting how bold and arrogant she is later on, and it would feel too exaggerated. (Of course, if you want to have a different kind of first meeting, it doesn't stop you from writing like this. You can just write that you are rich and you are lustful and casual. After all, rumors about lust are not as deep as personal experience.) ③This is really important. "And the belt around her waist seems to be telling others ~ Don't stop me." This kind of ancient pretense is no longer popular. It makes me scratch my toes. You can write that others saw this magical belt, explain what the belt represents, and then write that you are curious about which big boss it is, but you don't dare to provoke silently give way. You always feel that you are deliberately pretending, but he is obviously a cold killer. There is no fluctuation when seeing that the target of the mission is the richest man in the Southern Region. And when she saw the carriage, she shook her head. Why on earth was she shaking her head? Not written here. Why is a killer who looks so cold on the outside shaking his head? (This may be because you want to write about their entanglement later, so you can also add a psychological description so that people can tell at a glance, wow, is there something fishy between these two?) In short, the plot should not be too abrupt. Speaking of which, there was another one, a belt man came, but the younger brother directly asked her to walk to the boss's carriage and was ready to get on? ? ? Is this security serious? ? Can she really live to this point? The status of the richest man is very Schrödinger. She was able to find Qing to do guard work, but her younger brother didn't dare to stop her. She herself knew where the guard came from. It's strange that she is so arrogant and her subordinates are so humble. ④Chapter 2: Let's set off. I clicked on the scenery of the universe at first, nothing wrong with it, and then started teasing and being teased (I haven't had time to read the specific wording), and then the enemy attacked while teasing. There is a problem here. One, during the teasing, you just set off from the door, right? Is the defense force at the doorstep so poor? ? That's a bit too cool. After all, it's the capital planet. It's doing so poorly. It's a slap in the face. (If it's a wormhole jump or something like this, please be sure to point it out. "I saw here that it was mentioned later that it broke away from the ruling area. Then it's best to tell me why the ruling area broke away so quickly. I It feels like a teasing skill. The timeline must be clear. It does not necessarily use time to advance the plot, but the basic time should still be marked and highlighted. If not, please be sure to click on it. It has been flying for a few days, or you did not expect the timeline. You can change the teasing into daily life) Next, the richest man uses a carriage on his way? ? Moreover, the two people seemed to be sitting very close to each other, which gave me the feeling that the space was very small. If there is room for expansion, please click here. If this is cultivation later, then why don't you bring something into cultivation? ? Moreover, how the carriage flies must be marked, such as whether it is being pulled by a horse or a bird.
Come on come on
It's really awesome (? ??_??)?, It's so long, can I write thousands of chapters?
Where is the yandere girl Xiao Jiangjiang! It hasn't made its debut yet