That year the maple leaves were falling, and I knelt down facing your grave. Xu Xiaocan, I swore here at the end of the Qing Dynasty that if there is an afterlife, I hope we will never meet. I have a bad heart, and it was you who made me understand what love is, but why do you want me to understand what loss is? I hate you, hate your leaving without saying goodbye, hate your bottomless tolerance, and hate your... Love for me.
Slowly the breeze drifted away like smoke. The disappearance of your life made my heart feel like a knife, making me worse than dead. I approached you with a purpose, but you saw through it at a glance and gave me hope, pulling me back from the boundless darkness. Xu Xiaocan, maybe your punishment for me is to make me lose. ． ． ． ． ． Beloved.