I love you, so I persist
(1)
In an empty alley in the 1990s, a little boy over one year old was sitting at the door of the house, holding a small steamed bun in his hand, nibbling one bite after another. Occasionally, when he heard the sound of pedestrians walking, he would quickly turn his head and look, hoping that his mother-in-law was back.
I don't know if it was the hunger after eating the steamed buns, countless failed hopes, or the long loneliness that made this child remember this moment. Let this scene of waiting for the foster mother-in-law to come home become the child's first understanding of the world.
(2)
In the lively living room, two or three men were drinking wine and eating side dishes. Either out of fun or because they thought the children were too noisy, they dipped their chopsticks in wine and fed them to the children.
The spinning room and the laughter all around became the child's second memory of the world.
(3)
A handsome man was carrying two children on a bicycle. The older girl was holding the little boy who kept crying, and tricked the little boy into counting the dummies in the clothing store.
Being picked up by this strange man who calls himself his father one day a week. Perhaps it is this uneasiness and repetition that makes this episode the third memory of this little boy.
(Review)
These are the three images this little boy remembered before he was three years old. Loneliness, waiting, being teased, unprotected, and lacking a sense of security became his intuitive feelings about the world, and they also subtly affected his life.