You said you were afraid you would never be so nice to someone again. You will help him clean up all the mess he makes, and you will laugh at the mistakes he makes after getting angry. Even if he does so many things that hurt you, as long as he admits his mistakes, you will endure all the pain in your heart and accept him.
You said that all your youth was spent on him, and what you got in the end was not his deep love but repeated injuries. You said you had enough and you finally chose to leave. But the earth is round, and you are still involved again after all.