Life will inevitably be blinded by a leaf. If you don't know other people's paths, you won't be able to see your own destiny clearly.
She thinks that life is tragic and bitter. Although she relies on her own efforts to move forward step by step, there are countless unsatisfactory moments. Who knows that although life is hard, it is full of privileges and shitty luck.
If you can't push the leaves away, you will probably continue to suffer from self-righteousness; but if you really push the leaves away, it probably won't be much better.
She later realized that people still have to live, and it would be even worse if they died.