I have written this many times and don't know where to start. I don't know what kind of encounter should be arranged to complete such a story. I can't figure out what kind of existence I am in his heart. And I, in these ten years, once fell in love with him and once pushed him out of my life.
Every time I dream back at midnight, he is always with me. I lean on him, hold his arm, and listen to him slowly tell me his thoughts. I was angry that he didn't take me seriously, and I was happy that he was finally attracted to me. In my dreams, I met him countless times and always slept soundly and sweetly in his arms, unwilling to wake up. I never forced myself to know that this was a dream. I would try my best to cling to him in the dream, as if he had never left.
Ten years. I can't describe what a decade this has been for me. It is different from Wen Yan's ten years, and different from other people's ten years. Most of my ten years were waiting, quietly, and struggling.
Perhaps, you will ask me again, what about the subtracted year.
That year, I fell in love with someone else, but I never remembered or missed him. The rest of the days are mostly like now, calm but uneasy looking forward to one day, he will come back, will be real in front of my eyes, and then, whisper to him, I like you.
Just like that timid whisper, my love for him has always been cautious. It's not because of being humble, but because I can't always muster the courage. We promised each other to continue to grow stronger. Then, become each other's pride.
What I want to say is exactly that I am working hard, remembering our vows, being the best version of myself, and waiting for the best version of you.